Fallin' To Pieces
by ShirahsFantasy
Summary: How does Misaki react when Usagi-san raises his voice in anger at him? Where will he go? sorry very first attempt sorry to be a bother
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

A friend in need.

Misaki walked slowly through the park on the way back to Usagi-san's appartment. It was going to be so lonely and quiet there. He missed Usagi though he would rather die than let that perverted old man know it.

As he rounded the corner he noticed a boy his age sitting dejectedly on a park bench. His shoulders slumpped and his head was hanging down with his wild pink hair hiding his eyes. There was something about the boy that drew Misaki too him.

"Em...are you okay?" he softly said to the teenager

At the sound of Misaki's voice the teenager jerked but kept his head down his hair maintaining his privacy. A small slim wrist reached under his hair and discreetly wiped at his eyes. Misaki moved to sit beside the teenager pretending to have witnessed that betraying act of distress.

"Gomen" Misaki softly said appologetically. After a few minutes of silence Misaki made a move to stand up.

"Please stay." The teenagers musical voice pleaded. "I'm okay and it's nice to sit and talk with someone you don't know sometimes."

"My name is Misaki, I attend Mitsubishi University on the other side of the park." Misaki introduced himself.

The teenager looked up and gasped as he looked into the emerald eyes of Misaki. He had never seen eyes that colour before. They were like real jewels glowing in the sunlight.

"My name is Shuichi. I work and NG Productions. It is a pleasure to meet you."

"May I ask why you are so upset...gomen...it's none of my business...gomen..." Misaki desperately tried to backpeddal so as not to cause offence as he thought that he would like to be friends with this interesting looking teenager.

"I had a fight with my lover and he through me out ... again" Shuichi replied after a small awkward pause. "I could go and stay with my friend but he has his girlfriend visiting. I suppose I could always get a hotel room until Yuki cools off."

Eh...homo hormones. That is definately what this is. Am I sending out unseen signals or something. No...its just coincidence thats what it is. Misaki thought to himself shaking his head vigorously in denial not realising that Shuichi was watching him.

"No??" Shuichi asked in a puzzled voice wondering why this guy was so adament against him getting a hotel for the night.

"What sorry just thinking about something else." Misaki laughed awkwardly but then he paused. "You know ...my ...landlord is away for a few days why don't you come stay wth me? It's not far from here."

"I don't know.." Shuichi declined slowly

"Please you would be doing me a favour. I was just thinking, before I met you, how lonely and sad I was going to be when I got home with landlord away." Misaki begged him. The more he thought about it the better he liked the idea.

"Okay then thanks, I accept." The two teenagers then rose together with more cheerful spirits and headed towards Misaki's home. "Are you sure he won't mind my staying over?"

Misaki had a sudden picture in his mind of Usagi's face if he ever found out about this. He gulped then gave a nervous laugh.

"Ha Ha Ha, He won't mind I'm sure." At least he won't if I don't tell him about it.


	2. Chapter 2 A Friend in Deed

Chapter Two

A friend in deed.

It was dark now in the park. Misaki hadn't really thought of his plans when he had sneaked out of Usagi-san's appartment when he heard him enter his study. All he knew is that he had to get away. He couldn't bear to see Usagi-san. Couldn't bear to see the look of being a burden in Usagi's eyes. It was definately time to leave.

Unfortunately that left him with his current problem.

He couldn't go home to his brother's as things were awkward between them at the moment. Takahira had just found out about Misaki's true relationship with Usagi and things were very cool at the moment. If it hadn't been for Usagi's support Misaki didn't know what he would have done. But now that support was gone. Misaki was too much of a burden...

Suddenly and idea popped into Misaki's head. Shindou.

Across town the phone rings.

"Get the phone you dumb brat," Yuki yelled out only to suddenly realize that Shindou had left his phone at home whilst he went to the store. "Damn brat." He muttered as he reached for the phone. "Hello? What do you want?" He answered grumpilly thinking it was his brat's friend Hiro on the phone.

"He..ll..o," a timid voice came over the phone. "Sorry to bother you Shindou..."

"It's Eiri here Shindou's gone to the shops do you want to leave a message?" The sound of the timid voice caused Eiri's own inclination to be angery fade.

"iie..I'll...I'll ...call back later." The soft sad voice replied.

Eiri suddenly heard the key turn in the appartment door and quickly spoke into Shindou's phone. "Wait...wait...he's just come home." The front door opened and his hyperactive brat bounced in.

"Yuuukiii I'm ho.." He stopped suddenly seeing his Yuki standing in front of him. "Did you miss me?" He asked slyly before he noticed his love was talking on his phone. "Is that for me? Who is it?"

"How the hell should I know, brat??" Eiri yelled trying to cover up the fact that he had forgot to ask the caller that important question.

Shindou smirked, "You forgot to ask didn't you?"

"Shut up, and take your phone with you next time." Yuki huffed as he stomped back into his study to hide.

Shindou chuckles as he brings the phone up to his ear. "Hello, who's this?"

"Shin..shin...shindou is that you?" A sad timid voice could be heard. Shindou couldn't quite place the caller but the voice sounded familiar and so very very sad.

"Hai." Shindou replied sitting on the lounge with an unusually serious look on his face.

"It's Misaki. Do you remember me?"

"Misaki? Of course I do. You were kind enough to let me stay with you after that fight I had with my Yuki."

"Was...was...that your Yuki on the phone before? He sounded worse then my demon teacher at university."

Shindou laughed, "His bark is worse than his bite.." he paused for a second then continued. "Well maybe not."

Misaki gave a sad laugh at that then took a deep breathe. "Now I am the one in trouble. I need your help."

Shindou breathed in sharply. "Misaki?!! What is it? What is wrong? What do you need?"

"Somewhere to hide." The last word spoken as if on a soft gentl breeze.

"Are you alright Misaki...Misaki...Misake where are you?" There was no answer for a moment and Shindou began to jump around in a panic. He didn't notice Yuki standing with concern in his study doorway. "Misaki.." He yelled again in fear.

"The park .... come quick...I'm scared. I can hear voices...." Then there was silence.

"Yuki I've got to go out." Shindou yelled out as he ran to to appartment door.

"Shindou.." Yuki called out in concern to his lover. "Do you need any help?"

Shindou stopped and turned to his lover. Yuki was stunned to see the tears in his lovers eyes. But there was also a joy there also. "Would you? I don't want to be a bother but I think I may need you."

"Let's go." Yuki replied with a faint blush on his cheeks and grabbing the keys to his ferrari as he dragged his lover to the garage. "Where to?"

"The park, Yuki, and please hurry I think Misaki is in big trouble."

At the park Misaki sat behind a large tree hoping that the voices that were approaching would go past him without spotting him. They sounded like rough, drunken voice. He should never have come out into the park at night. He was so scared. He hoped that Shindou would get here soon.

The voices stopped in front of the tree and began to torment any unfortunate passerbye's. Misaki tried to make himself as small as possible but in doing so accidently stept on a dry twig. The snapping of the twig sounded like a gun shot in the darkness. The voices stopped and Misaki held his breath but he knew that it was too late.

Rough hands reached around the tree and pulled him into the lamp light.

"Well...well...well...what do we have here? Isn't he a gorgeous specimen? Looks like we've got lucky fellas. We're going to be haveing some real fun tonight." The voice laughed with an evilness that Misaki had never before heard in his life.

He felt rough hands pulling at his shirt.

"Hey..let me go you bastards. What do you think your doing? Im a man you know a man."

He felt a sudden sharp pain across his mouth and it took him a moment to realize that one of them had slapped him hard. He could taste the blood coming from his stinging broken lip.

Then there was a sharp blinding pain to his stomache as another punched him there. He bent over doubled onto the ground as he tried to catch his breath. Then he could feel nothing but pain as three men hovered over him kicking him and hitting him indiscriminately.

Then through all that pain he heard a loud musical voice calling his name.

Taking a deep desperate breath he screamed "Shindou" before passing out.

"Shindou" The scream echoed thoughout the park. It was a voice filled with desperation, horror, fear and pain.

"Yuki," Shindou turned to his lover in fear only to see him already running in the direction the scream had come from. "Thank you Yuki" Shindou whispered as he ran after his lover. Shindou knew that he was fast but Yuki was even faster and by the time Shindou arrived at the scene there were three men bloodied and unconscious on the ground, and a whimpering teenager curled into a tight ball in Yuki's arms.

Tears were streaming down Yuki's face as the simularities between what happened to his beloved Shindou and what had happened to this young teenager. He couldn't save Shindou until it was all over and despite the savagery of the attack he couldn't help but feel that he had redeemed himself in saving Shindou's friend, if only a little.

"We need to take him to a hospital." Yuki whispered to his lover as Shindou wrapped an arm around him.

The wounded teenager in his arms stirred. "No hospitals. Please...no ....hospitals." Before lapsing into uncosciousness.

"What do we do?" Yuki asked Shindou in frustration. "He's your friend brat."

"How about Hiro's appartment? He's gone to Asaka for a month he won't mind." Shindou suggested picking up Misaki's bag that had been lying beside the men.

"Okay lets get him settled then I can call a friend of mine to have a look at him." Yuki turned and started down the path leading to his car.

Shindou stopped. "Yuki?"

Yuki stopped and turned to face his lover puzzled, "Yes brat what is it now?"

Shindou pointed to the still unconsious men. "What about them?"

"Don't give a damn about them. I hope they get hypothermia and die," Yuki spat out viciously.

"Yuuukiiii!" Shindou said in a shocked voice, although he did secretly agree with Yuki. "Lets just call the cops and let them deal with them."

"Okay brat. You do it my arms are full at the moment."

"Hai," Shindou dialled the police and told them what had happened, leaving out Misaki's name, and where they could be found as he followed Yuki to the car. By the time he had finished the call Yuki had placed Misaki gently on the back seat.

"Yuki, you seem to be handling this very personally for some reason." Shindou said in a puzzled tone to his partner as he slid into the passenger seat.

Yuki slid behind the steering wheel of the car paused then turned sad eyes towards Shindou. "It felt personal." He said pausing before adding softly, "I wasn't able to save you or help you when this happened to you but in a way I felt that being here when you needed me,to save you friend ,that in some bizare way I was atoning for that."

"Oh, Yuki. You didn't need to feel that way. What happened to me was more about jealousy towards Bad Luck than anything to do with you."

"I know that but I should have been able to protect you anyway." Yuki sighed as he started the engine.

"Oh, Yuki," Shindou sighed sadly before resting his head gently on Yuki's shoulder as he drove. "Thank you for your help tonight. It meant a lot to me."

"Who is he??" Yuki ansked Shindou softly with a slight hint of jealousy in his tone.

"A stranger who what there to help me when I needed a friend. I met him in that park after the fight we had last month. He let me stay at his place whilst his landlord was away. But I got the feeling that this 'landlord' was something more."

"So that's where you were brat when I was so worried ringing everyone trying to find you." Yuki growled softly.

"Hai. He taught me how to make misu soup. You know the one you like so much."

"I owe him double thanks than." Yuki said glancing at the boy on the back seat.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Akihiko leant back in his chair and glanced at the clock on his computer, 0845.

"What?! It can't be that late already. Why didn't Misaki call me for breakfast?" The talk blonde man stretched out his tightened muscles as he walked slowly to his lovers bedroom door.

He called out to his lover as he opened the door and poked his head inside Misaki's room. "Oh, Misaki where's my break....huh! He must have left for classes already." He muttered to himself as he noticed that the bed was empty.

"He must be pissed with me still after I sent him to his room last night. Oh well, I'll just have to put him in good mood when he gets home." He smirked to himself as he thought of what he would be doing to his love to get that good mood. "Maybe I should prepare him a little. His class hasn't started quite yet I'll give him a quick 'pep' talk to tide him over."

He reached inside his jacket and dialled Misaki's number. He listened for a few minutes as the phone continued to ring but failed to be answered. A small frown marred his handsome face as he started to get concerned that his lover was more than pissed with him. He hanged up the phone and decided to catch up on some sleep until Misaki came home.

Curling up to Suzuki-san was not the same as curling up to his sweet Misaki so it took him longer to get to sleep than he thought.

When he woke it was after 2pm in the afternoon and Akihiko decided to go to visit his professor friend at the university whilst he waited for Misaki to finish for the day.

"Stop treating my office as your personal library you bastard." Hiroki snapped when he walked into his office and found Akihiko making himself comfortable reading one of his new books that he had only just picked up for his favourite book store.

"Ah, how is the demon sensai of Mitsuhashi University. Slaughtered any new unsuspecting students today?"

"They all survived thank you very much," Hiroki replied sarcastically plonking himself into a nearby office chair.

"What," Akihiko exclaimed with insincere shock. "which one is it? Are you going soft or just losing your touch."

Hiroki smirked, "As if it would be me going soft and your young love would attest to when you see him next."

"Oh?" Akihiko enquired with a hint of warning in his voice.

"Hai. I've got him so scared he didn't even come to my class today. Is he at home quivering in his lonely bed whilst your here pestering me and putting your filthy hands on my precious books."

Akihiko's head jerked up when he heard this. Concern flashing across his face for a brief moment. If Hiroki hadn't been staring at him hoping to catch a reaction from him he wouldn't have caught it. He wouldn't have felt a sudden sharp chill of fear run up his spine.

"Maybe it is just you that he didn't like. I am sure he attended his other classes. He left early enough for them." Akihiko suggested with a smirk but there was a small frown starting to play between his eyes.

"No. His missed Professor Miyagi class as well. His friend Sumi says he hasn't seen him all day. I asked him when he missed his second class. I thought it was odd because you usually call with some lame excuse as to why he's having the day off, usually with him screaming abuse at you in the background." Hiroki denied with growing concern. It wasn't like Misaki to cause this kind of concern to others especially not to his beloved Usagi-san. Something was definitely wrong.

"Maybe he's visiting with Takahiro?" Hiroki suggested trying to cheer up his old friend. Things were not looking good. Not good at all.

"No there's been some problems there."

"Eh. Between Misaki and Takahiro. They adore each other what could disrupt that?" Hiroki asked shocked at this disruption in what he had always thought was a near on perfect relationship between two brothers.

"We told him about us and to say that he was shocked would be an understatement. They haven't spoken to each other in almost a week. Manami-san said that she would work on him and for us not to worry but it is hard to see the pain in Misaki's face." Akihiko said sadly.

"Just check anyway." Hiroki encouraged sure that that was where Misaki was. If he was he was going to make his lessons a living hell for worrying Akihiko like this.

"Hai." Akihiko said quietly as he dialled the number. He was a bit nervous as he didn't know what he would say if Takahiro answered the phone but his luck was in and he heard Manami's soft voice come over the phone. "Ah, Manami-san how are you?"

"Oh, Akihiko it might still be a bit too soon to say although there have been some minor improvements in Taki's behaviour regarding you and Misaki." Manami stated but Akihiko could hear a hint of joyful hope in her voice.

"Oh..good...good. Ah, I've actually rung about Misaki." Akihiko said hesitantly.

"Is something wrong with Misaki? Should I get Taki to come to the phone?" Manami asked concern clearly in her voice.

"Oh, no, no. I just wanted to say how happy Misaki is that you are helping Takahiro through this." Akihiko said quickly back-peddling so as not to worry Misaki's family.

"Tell him I am happy to do so. I love you both very much you know. You clearly make Misaki very happy. Is he there? Can I speak to him?"

"Sorry Manami, but he's still in class. I just thought I would ring and tell you whilst he wasn't around you know how he is when he gets embarrassed."

Manami laughed, "He's a bit hypo then isn't he. Oh, well. Give him our love."

Akihiko hanged up his phone and turned to face Hiroki. His face pale and his eyes filled with such fear that Hiroki was truly concerned for his friends well-being. He knew that Akihiko adored his Misaki and would be a wreck if anything happened to him.

"Misaki where are you? Are you safe? Why don't you call?" Hiroki thought to himself as Akihiko stumbled slowly to a nearby chair and collapsed.

"And when you do I am going to beat you to death." He added angrily to himself as he walked up to his childhood friend and held him as tears started to gather in his eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Missing You

Misaki had been floating around in comforting darkness for some time. Every now and then he saw light in the distance but he felt compelled to hide from it. It was safe in the darkness. There was no pain. No fear. But it was lonely. He could faintly hear voices coming from the other side of the light but he didn't recognise them. He wanted to stay but...he didn't want to be lonely no more... and so...

The body of the young teenager lay lying in the bed with his face facing the wall. Looking at him you would never tell the trauma that he recently suffered. His face, though pale, was unblemished. Then he turned and the change was shocking. His full bottom lip still slightly bleed where it had been cut by the bruiser's fist. Down the side of his right face was an already darkening bruise. His right eye swollen. Hand marks could be seen around his neck where someone had held him down.

"Well, what do you think Nowaki-san? Is he going to be alright?" Shuichi asked fearfully of the dark haired giant currently leaning over his friend.

"Despite roughing him up a lot those …. jerks....didn't seem to do too much damage. He's going to have some really marvellously coloured bruises though." Nowaki reassured his friends pink haired lover. "He's in pretty good health considering...."

Just at that moment the still body on the bed suddenly began thrashing about and yelling. "Get off me you bastards. Nooo..." the two men standing beside the bed suddenly jumped in surprise. "...Usagi-san..." As the name was screamed from still thrashing body his eyes flew open and he looked about himself with fear clearly visible.

"Misaki...Misaki..It's alright. Your safe. Your safe." Shuichi ran to his friends side and gripping the wildly flapping hands in his own.

"Shuichi??" Misaki's eyes cleared and he looked at his friend. "Where...where am I? I'm safe?"

"Yes your safe Misaki. I've brought you to my friend Hiro's apartment He's away for a few weeks so you are quite safe here. No one will know your here. I promise."

Whilst Shuichi had been talking Misaki had slowly looked around at his surroundings. Now they have landed on the biggest man he had ever seen in his life. But somehow he looked so familiar.

"Shuichi..."he whispered in awe and with a slight hint of fear, "who's the giant."

The giant laughed out loud. It wasn't a great booming laugh but a gentle rumble. "Konichiwa Misaki-san. I am Nowaki. I am a friend of Eri, and a doctor. You refused to be taken to the hospital but your friends were concerned regarding your injuries so they rang me." Seeing the questioning look in the teenagers eyes he hastened to reassure him. "Don't worry Misaki-san no broken bones but your body is going to be a wonderful masterpiece of bruises. But I would suggest bed rest for at least 2 days though just to be sure."

"Hai," Misaki replied in a downhearted voice. He was being a bother again. Why couldn't he learn to stand on his own two feet?

Nowaki looked at Shuichi and gave a jerk of his head towards the main door. Shuichi nodded and stood up.

"Misaki, I'll just walk Nowaki-san to his car and grab some medications for you. I'll be right back."

Misaki's tightly bandaged hand reached out quickly and grabbed Shuichi's in a grip that was amazingly strong considering the injury it had received.

"Don't leave me," he cried out in fear and desperation. Then he seemed to freeze as if remembering something. Dropping Shuichi's hand he continued, "Gomen I am being a bother."

"Misaki," Shuichi whisper sadly. "You are not a bother but I really need to get you your medication." He added clearly feeling divided between staying and comforting Misaki and getting the medication to help him get better.

"Do not worry Shuichi-san I will go and tell Eri what is required and he can bring them to you when he comes to visit." Nowaki interrupted Shuichi.

"Eh, that will be okay?"

"Hai, hai. I will see you tomorrow Misaki. Now rest." Nowaki smiled his large gentle smile and wave at the two teenagers as he left the apartment.

There was silence in the apartment for a few minutes as each teenager struggled to find something to talk about.

"Shui.."

"Misa.."

The two boys spoke at the same time then stopped before looking at each other and laughing until tears welled up in Misaki's eyes.

"Stop, ha ha ha. Don't make me laugh, ha ha ha. My ribs are ha ha killing me ha ha," he said trying to stop laughing. However, the more he tried to stop laughing the more he laughed. He could feel himself getting hysterical.

Shuichi started to look at him with concern then got up and rushed to the kitchen. He returned to the bed holding a glass of water which he proceeded to throw into Misaki's face.

Misaki gasped with shock and stared at Shuichi.

"Gomen," Shuichi apologia bowing. "You were getting hysterical and as I didn't think slapping you face was appropriate at this time, considering."

"Th...th...that's okay Shuichi, I was beginning to scare myself. I have never lost control like that before. It was most embarrassing."

"What were you going to say before?" Shuichi asked trying to get a conversation started.

Misaki looked puzzled for a minute before talking, "Oh, hai. How come that doctor called your...boyfriend ...Eri? I thought his name was Yuki?"

"He is both." Shuichi said smiling at the puzzled look on his friends face. "His real name is Eri

but he writes under Yuki and so I call him that. Kinda like a pet name, you know what I mean?"

"Hai, I call my...landlord...Usagi-san but his real name is...something different too."

Shuichi smiled at Misaki. He noticed that Misaki had not told him what his landlord..'yeah, right' he scoffed to himself 'bet he's more than a landlord'...name was. He noticed Misaki trying to hide a yawn behind his hand for the second time in as many minutes.

"Why don't you get some more rest?" Shuichi suggested as he got up from the bed and started tidying up the apartment.

"Hai," Misaki replied with another yawn as he snuggled under the covers.

Shuichi hummed the tune of his bands latest song as he continued to tidy up. After a few minutes he stopped singing and slowly turned and faced Misaki. Misaki laid curled into a tight ball and facing the wall. Shuichi could see the faint trails of tears as he witnessed his friend crying as if his young heart would break. What happened to him? Why was he in the park at night? More importantly why was he crying like a part of him was dying?


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Where the hell is he? I bet that bastard professor has got him cornered with his filthy hands on my Miyagi." The young brown haired teenager fumed as he paused and looked at the clock for the fifth time in as many minutes.

Suddenly he heard the sound of a key in the apartment door turning and he jerked the door open startling the tall dark haired man on the other side. He opened his mouth to start berating his lover when he saw the look on his face.

Miyagi's eyes were filled with worry. His face pale and deep lines were appearing between his worried eyes. Something was wrong. Something was very very wrong. Shinobu had never seen his usually joking partner with such a frighteningly serious look on his face.

"Miyagi, what's wrong? What's happened? Has father found out about us and fired you? Did that bastard Kamijou touch you? What is it? What's wrong?" Shinobu cried out pulling his partner forcibly into the apartment by grabbing onto his limp arm.

He watched in stunned amazement as Miyagi suddenly dropped his briefcase and caught Shinobu to him in a tight hug as if he would never let him go.

"Never leave me," Miyagi begged. "Even if I do something really bad, never ever leave me."

Shinobu was shocked. Miyagi was never this emotional. He could see the beginning of tears forming in his lovers dark eyes. What was even worse he could feel Miyagi trembling. His whole body was shaking as if he was standing in the snowfield beside Mount Fuji and not in his lounge room in the middle of summer.

"Miyagi, your scaring me. Have you done something bad? I'll never leave you. Baka, after all the trouble it took me just to get you to look at me differently I am not going to throw all that effort away. What has happened? Here sit down. I'll make us a cup of tea." Shinobu pushed Miyagi down onto the lounge and ran into the kitchen to make the tea.

It wasn't so much that Shinobu wanted tea. Or even that he felt that the situation warranted tea. It was an excuse. He hadn't been lying when he told his lover that he was scaring him. Shinobu needed the time it took to prepare the tea to prepare himself for what would be mindblowingly disasterous news.

"Here you go Miyagi. Now start at the beginning. What is the matter?" Shinobu said as he handed Miyagi his tea and sat down on the lounge oposite him.

"Kamijou..."Miyagi started to say softly before Shinobu interupted him.

"That bastard. What had he done now?"

"Hush Shinobu." Miyagi said too distressed to even make a smirk or evil joke at his poor friends expense. "This isn't about Kamijou. It's about Misaki."

"Misaki...wait up that was what I was so pissed at you in the first place. You were really late and I missed meeting Misaki in the park." Shinobu said distracting Miyagi for a minute on what he was about to say.

"You are supposed to meet Misaki?" Miyagi said suddenly full of energy. "Where? When?" then a pause "Why?" with just a hint of jealousy.

"Idiot. I told you, you remember. Last night. He's going to teach me how to cook. We're meeting in the park at 6pm." Shinobu said frustratedly looking at the clock again. "In five minutes to be exact and now I am going to be late."

"No your not. Grab your coat I'll drive you." Miyagi jumped up and dragged Shinobu down to the garage and tossed him into the car.

"I'll still be too late," Shinobu scoffed. "You drive like an old ladddddyyyyy"

Shinobu's voice trailed off with a small scream as his usually slow as a turtle partner turned into one of those hoon's one hears about on the news. The cars tires were still squealing as it leapt over the gutter straight into the middle lane.

"Hold on," Miyagi said laughing manically.

"Oh God." Shinobu screamed. "You just took that corner on two wheels. Two wheels, Miyagi. Are you insane. Are you even Miyagi."

With a further screech of tyres Miyagi came to an abrupt halt next to the park where Shinobu was to meet Miyagi. Dragging Shinobu out of the car he gave him an impatient look.

"Now where? Where, where, where?" Miyagi asked his voice rising on each question. His eyes widening with hope and something that Shinobu could not name.

"Just what is all this excitement in meeting with Misaki?" Shinobu asked, jealousy now clear in his own voice.

"Oh, your soooo cute." Miyagi laughed excitedly. "Now where were you going to meet Misaki? Can you see him yet?"

Shinobu pointed to the bench at the top of the hill in the middle of the park. Then gasped as Miyagi grabbed his arm and proceeded to run all the way to the spot Shinobu had indicated. This concerned Shinobu who had never seen his normally collected and lazy lover be so energetic.

"Here? Is this the spot? Are we on time?" Miyagi asked Shinobu.

Shinobu looked at the watch that Miyagi had given him for his birthday the previous week and nodded. "This is the place and … whoa...Miyagi we're on time. I am impressed."

Miyagi sat down on the bench and Shinobu sat down next to him. Seconds latter, however, Miyagi was up again, looked as his watch, looked about the park then sat back down. Shinobu looked at his lover in amazement. 'Sheesh!' he thought to himself 'what is with this guy today?'

Shinobu watched Miyagi repeat this action 15 times, that's right 15 times, he knows because he had began counting them just to pass the time whilst he waited for Misaki to arrive. Finally he had had enough. He looked at his watch, sighed, then turned to Miyagi.

"I guess he's not coming after all." Shinobu said disappointed looking at Miyagi through his hair to watch what his reaction was going to be. Miyagi was acting very odd. Very very odd indeed.

"No, no." Miyagi denied. "There's still plenty of time."

"Baka," Shinobu shouted at him. "It's getting dark. The park lights are coming on. It's time to go home."

"But we've only just got here.'' Miyagi said puzzled looking around the park as if coming out of a daze.

"We've been here for 2 hours Miyagi. I'm hungry. Let's go home and you can finish your explanation or we could just do something else..." Shinobu said with a soft smirk on his lips.

Despite a blush appearing on Miyagi's cheeks he shook his head. "Let's wait just a little while longer okay Shinobu? Hay I know why don't you try calling him?"

Shinobu gave Miyagi a worried look, shrugged, then pulled his phone out of his windbreakers pocket. Dialling in Misaki's number he sat to wait for it to ring.

Ring, ring, ring.

Shinobu jumped up. "That's Misaki's ringtone." He shouted to Miyagi excitedly. "He's here." But when Shinobu turned around he couldn't see his friend behind him. "What the...l"

He stood up and walked to where he could still hear Misaki's phone ringing from. He walked behind a large tree and saw Misaki's phone laying on the ground partially covered with dirt and its screen cracked. He bent down and picked it up just as the last of the battery power ran out.

"Miyagi," Shinobu said slowly as he returned from behind the tree. "It's Misaki's phone and it's broken. He would never leave his phone. He would be too concerned with worrying Usami-san. What the hell is going on? Miyagi!!!"

Shinobu ran to his lover who had gone pale and collapsed on the nearby bench. "Miyagi, what is it for God's sake just tell me. Has something happened to Misaki?"

Miyagi sighed. He had hoped to keep this from his young lover. He hadn't realised just how close their group had gotten over the past few months. He couldn't keep it from him anymore. He could see the fear growing in his lovers eyes.

"Misaki has run away." Miyagi said with a sad sigh. "Usami-san has not seen him since late yesterday night. That is why I was late getting home. I have been helping Usami-san and Kamijou look for him amoungst his friend. I hadn't realised that he had so few. I had completely forgot that you had told me you were meeting with him. I was so hoping that he would keep that appointment and now this." He ended looking worriedly down at the damaged phone. "How am I going to tell Usami-san about this?"

Shinobu was shocked. Misaki...run away...from his Usagi-san. It was not possible. Misaki loved Usami-san as much as Shinobu loved Miyagi. What the HELL was going on??


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Misaki...run away...from his Usagi-san. What the HELL was going on_??

Shinobu looked down at his feet in shock. He remembered the last thime he saw Misaki and Usami-san together The unguarded look on Misaki's face when he watched Usami-san was filled with such an innocent abiding lobe. 'No,' Shinobu thought to himself. 'A person did not look at someone like that one day then turn around and leave them two days later. There was more to this. Something else was going on and as Misaki's friend it was his responsibility to find out what.'

"Come on Myagi," Shinobu said standing up with determination clear in his voice.

"Eh," Myagi said surprised as he looked up at his your lovers face. He knew that look. It was what he had come to call his 'terrorist face'. He sighed to himself as he stood up. A small smirk played around his lips as he thought, 'Now we're in for it.'

"Stop moaning old man. There's more to this than what I,ve heard. Something else is behind this and if you guys weren't so old and quite clearly suffering from early onset dementia then you would already know that. The fact that this phone was found broken behind that tree proves it. Misaki is very careful with this phone."

Myagi smiled. This was the longest most speech Shinobu had made in quite some time. He was right though. It didn't feel right. He knew how much Usami-san loved Misaki and he knew that hurting Misaki would be the last thing he would ever want to do.

'Oh well,' he thought to himself. 'In for a penny in for a pound.'

"Ok, Shinobu what's the plan?"

"Now your thinking," Shinobu congratulated Myagi. "We're going to Misaki's place and search for clues. Also we need to charge Misaki's phone and see who he called in case that's a clue. I don't want Usami-san to know we have the phone though."

"Why's that?" Myagi asked puzzled.

"And your the professor," Shinobu shook his head in disappointment. "If we told Usami-san about finding the phone it would worry him more. For starters Misaki doesn't have it and secondly it was found broken which means Misaki could have been injured."

Half an hour later Shinobu and Myagi were standing outside Akikiho and Misaki's apartment.

"Don't forget the plan. I have to grab some notes from Misaki's room is my cover. You need to distract Usami-san and see if there is any more updates. Do not give anything away?"

Myagi turned his face away from his young lovers so as to hide the growing smile on his own at the furiosous look on Shinobu's face. It was sooo cute and if only they were home then things would have gotten very interesting and verrry enjoyable. Instead he nodded and raised his hand to knock on the door.

The door was opened with such force that the two waiting took a step back. The hinges creaked but still managed to stay with the door.

As they looked at the person behind the door their collective hearts broke.

Akihiko would indeed be found dying in a gutter if his Misaki didn't come back soon to take care of him. He looked like he had not slept since Misaki's disappearence. His normally immaculate look was clearly gone and in its place was a man clearly in need of a bath and a change of cloths. His face had had a look of hope when the door had opened. When he realised it wasn't who he was hoping for the look had melted away. Instead a look of despair had fallen over his face. He turned away from the door and sat down on the lounge fiercely hugging the large bear known as Suzuki-san. Behind him stood Kamijou.

The couple came into the apartment closing the door behind them. As one they looked at Kamijou. Kamijou looked back and sadly shook his head.

"Right," Shinobu stepped forward forcibly. Turning to his partner he said. "Plan B"

"Eh," Myagi said puzzled. "Plan B. There was a Plan B?"

"Baka," Shinobu snapped. "There's always a Plan B. Don't you guys know anything?"

Kamajou looked at Myagi who shrugged. Akihiko didn't respond at all. He was still looking blankly into space hugging the bear.

Shinobu walked up to Akihiko and stood in front of him.

"If Misaki could see you now he would vomit." He said sharply to the depressed man.

"Hey hey Shinobu what do you think your doing." Both his partner and Kamajou reproached him. Akihiko lifted his head angrily to look at the teenager before him

"Shut up," Shinobu said to the other adults not taking his eyes off of Akihiko. "What the hell do you think your playing at? When Misaki get's home do you really want him to see you looking like something the cat dragged in?"

"He's not coming home," Akihiko finally said. His voice cracking in pain and misuse.

"Are you and idiot? Of course he's coming home. He loves you, we all know that. He would never leave you. Unless...." Shinobu stopped and looked at the man before him with suspision.

"Unless...what?" Akihiko asked fearfully.

"Unless you did something truly bad to hurt him or if he felt he was a burden." Shinobu paused then snapped. "Well did you?"

"I did." Akihiko sighed drooping like a man who had lost all hope.

"Well," Shinobu asked harshly. "For crying out loud old man I want the details and don't miss out anything."

"Hey Shinobu, this isn't any of our business. You are being too harsh." Kamijou interupted placing a hand on Akikiho's shoulder protectively.

"Stop molly-coddling him you moron. Now is not the time to allow his mind to be clouded by depression. We need him to think clearly." Shinobu snapped in disgust.

"Huh??" All three men said looking at Shinobu in surprise at his abrupt manner.

"You and Myagi are not helping. Go and make tea." Shinobu demanded. Kamijou opened his mouth to argue with the teenager but Myagi, who recognised the look on his partners face, grabbed his arm and dragged him to the kitchen. From there they could still see and hear everything that was happening.

"Now Usami-san. Tell me exactly what happened."

Akihiko sighed sadly, " He came home from Uni. He was upset about something he started yelling and getting overly excited so I told him to go to his room until he calmed down. I called....called him a brat. I yelled at him. So now he hates me. He left me and is never coming back. There are you happy? Are you satisfied? I hurt my Misaki."

"Alright, didn't I just say I wanted details. Are you going senile on me?"

In the kitchen Kamijou gasped with indignation but Myagi placed a hand on his shoulder and he stayed where he was in the kitchen. The tea had been made but clearly their prescence was not wanted yet.

"Okay let's do it my way. I'll ask the questions and you answer them. I'm sure you'll be able to manage that."

"God your a rude one aren't you," Akihiko snapped. "How does Myagi put up with you?"

"Myagi likes my sassy tongue and not just for conversation," Shinobu smirked and looked over at his lover, who chocked on his tea, whilst Akihiko appeared lost for words.

"Now let's get started. How has Misaki been in the days leading up to this? You said he had come home upset."

Akihiko stared at the young man before him. For the first time in days his thoughts began to clarify as he was forced to go over events more carefully.

"Well," he said slowly. "We told his brother that we were lovers on Saturday. It didn't go well. Takahiro basically threw us out of the apartment. His wife was more accepting. It appears she already had her suspisions."

The two men in the kitchen remade the tea and brought it into the lounge. Myagi smiled at Shinobu with encouragement. Kamijou also grudgingly grunted his approval.

"Who's idea was it? Yours or Misaki's?" Shinobu asked.

"Misaki's, why?" Akihiko asked.

"Mmmm......I do not think this has any bearing on the situation?" Shinobu decided.

"You don't?" Kamijou asked surprised. "Why not?"

"Well Misaki and I talked about this on Sunday. Whilst he was saddened by his brothers response he wasn't surprised about it. He also believed that his brother would accept the relationship because his brother loved him and he also knew that his brother loved Usami-san. Plus it had been Misaki's decision to tell him. It wasn't something that he had felt forced to do by Usami-san. Also when we last spoke he had said how much he appreciated the support his 'Usagi-san' was giving him."

Akihiko sighed and his body relaxed fractionally.

"You had been worried about this haven't you, Usami-san?" Shinobu asked the man before him softly.

Akihiko nodded and smiled faintly.

"Anything else?"

Akihiko straighted a bit more in his seat as he brought his tea up to his lips and took a long slow sip. His mind pulling together images of Misaki over the past week.

"On Monday he seemed fine but..." He paused and a frown formed between his eyes as he struggled to remember.

"Yes," Shinobu encouraged softly.

"On Tuesday he had this sad look in his eyes. When I asked about it he just said that it was nothing and I put it down to the situation with his brother."

"Misaki told be that you always eat breakfast together."

"Yes, that's true."

"What were his eyes like at breakfast?" Shinobu asked looking carefully at the man before him.

"His eyes at breakfast," Akihiko said slowly looking back in his mind to what his Misaki looked like at breakfast. He saw the cute face he made when he came down the stairs. He heard him moaning about being late for uni because of making breakfast. In his mind he looked at his lovers face and then into his eyes. "They were a bit sleepy but there wasn't any sadness there but when I saw him later there was definitely sadness there, sadness and..."

"Sadness and …?" Shinobu prompted.

"Fear," Akihiko said his head snapping up and looking at Shinobu. "And it was after the mail had come."

"Did he get a letter?"

"I don't know but they were scattered on the table. Usually Misaki brings them up to me in my study...then I reward him." A soft smirk appeared breifly on Akihiko's lips before disappearing.

"Deviation from normal habit." Shinobu muttered to himself. "First clue."

The two professors nodded in agreement. Definitely a clue. Misaki had gotten a letter. A letter which had upset him.

"We need to find the letter." Shinobu stated with conviction. He left the men and began to climb the stairs to Misaki's room.

"Oi, what are you doing?" Akihiko asked in surprised as he guessed at Shinobu's intent. "It isn't right to invade Misaki's privacy."

"It's his own fault," Shinobu stated.

"How do you figure that?" Akihiko asked a bit defensively.

"Well, if he came to you when he had a problem then things wouldn't be where they are at the moment, would they? Therefore its his fault and I for one don't feel an ounce of guilt." Shinobu stated smugly.

Kamijou turned to his collegue, "Is he always this smug?"

Shinobu scowled as Myagi spoke, "You don't honestly expect me to answer that in hearing range do you?"

"Hey," Shinobu protested as he turned and walked into Misaki's room. 'Bloody hell, how neat is that guy.'

Misaki's room was freakishly tidy. His books were in his bookcase, his cloths were either folded up and put away or placed in the laundry basket. The only thing out of place was a small book almost hidden under the bed.

'Ah ha,' Shinobu thought smugly to himself. 'Second clue.' He sat down on Misaki's bed and carefully flipped though the pages. Half-way through the book there was the letter. He put down the book and began to read the letter.

The men were talking amongst themselves whilst they were waiting for Shinobu to finish in Misaki's room. For the first time in days Akihiko began to feel hope. The men stopped talking when suddenly Misaki's bedroom door slammed open and Shinobu stood at the top of the stairs.

"Care to explain this you bastard?" Shinobu demanded with fury waving the letter in the air.

***********************************************

Hope you like this chapter. I feel creul messing about with Akihiko's feelings of hope but, hey, what the hell. Sorry if it's a bit long. Let me know what you think.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Don't own Gravitation or JJ Romantica. Love the authors of both to bits. So jealous. :)

Chapter 7

Misaki tossed and turned in his sleep. Soft whimpers of pain and fear escaping through dry lips. Each time a pained noise came from the teenager the tall slim blonde typing at the table

would jump and go pale. It was as if the man himself was being tormented. He rose unsteadily from the table to stand by the teenagers bed. Initially he had attempted to comfort the

teenager by ruffling his hair gently, like he did to comfort his Shuichi, but the first time he had done this Misaki had jerked his head away and gave a particularly load cry of pain. He'd

called out "Usagi-san" in a voice of such heartbreaking longing that the man had rushed from the apartment under the pretext of needing a smoke.

Misaki was struggling once again against the thugs in the park. He called out for Usagi-san but he never came. In his dream he knew that his lover would never come to save him but he

kept calling him, kept hoping to see his lovers face. Slowly he became aware of other voices – a man talking loudly,angrily and a younger voice responding softly.

He forced his eyes open and watched the couple across the room.

"Get out you brat," the older man was saying. "I can't work with your racket and don't come back."

"Ah, Yuki?" the soft voice questioned softly sounding quite timid.

"What is it brat?" Yuki muttered angrily as he turned to refill his coffee mug in the kitchenette.

Misaki cringed unnoticed in his bed. His eyes filling with tears. Now he was being a bother to his new friend and hurting his friends relationship with his...lover. He was in the way. He was

a bother.

"This is Hiro's apartment," Shuichi said. Misaki saw Shuichi lower his head and his shoulders beginning to tremble.

Yuki stood still, at a loss for words, then he sighed deeply grabbed his laptop and papers together before stomping from the apartment slamming the door behind him.

Shuichi stood facing the door with his shoulders shaking. He reached for the kitchen table and leaned on it with one hand whilst his other hand went to cover his face.

Misaki swallowed his tears before hesitantly calling out to his friend. "Shuichi, are you alright?" Gasping as his friend turned to face him.

Shuichi's face was not what Misaki was expecting. I mean he was expecting tears and there were tears. Great rivers of tears flowing down Shichi's face. But that is where the

expectations ended. Shuichi was laughing. He was laughing so hard that he could barely stand. He was clearly trying to calm himself down.

"I've been wanting to do that too him for so long. Thank you Misaki." Shuichi would have continued to laugh if he had not looked into Misaki's face and saw the fear, concern and

confusion clearly written there.

"What's wrong Misaki? Are you in pain?" he asked his friend in concern rushing to his side.

Misaki was stunned. He would have been shattered had his Usagi-san had spoken to him like that and yet here was his friend treating it as though it was the joke of the century. He

didn't understand what was going on.

"Aren't you upset." Misaki asked hesitantly giving his friend a puzzled look.

"Upset?"

"Yuki-san was very angry just now. I'm sorry to be causing such a bother to your relationship. I can find somewhere else to stay if you like." Misaki said in a rush trying to sit up in the

bed. However, his face went pale and he flopped bag down with a loud moan of pain.

"Oh, Misaki don't be silly. Your not a bother," Shuichi rushed to reassure his friend and attempted to comfort him.

Tears were beginning to gather in Misaki's eyes making them glitter like brilliant emeralds. Shuichi gathered his friend in his arms making soothing noises and rubbing the trembling

teenagers back.

"What's wrong Misaki? Talk to me." Shuichi begged his friends. I don't understand why you are so upset. Please talk to me."

"You were f..f..fighting with Yuki-san. H..h..he called you a brat. H..h..he told you not to bother come home." Misaki stuttered.

"This is what upset you?" Shuichi asked puzzled, unsure why it was bothering his friend.

Misaki nodded his head looking at his friend through his bangs for signs that he had upset Shuichi.

"Oh, Misaki, things are not always what they seem on the surface," Shuichi reassured the shaking teenager. Shuichi fluffed up the pillows then settled Misaki back against them so that he

was resting comfortably. "Let me make some tea then we'll talk."

Shuichi potted around the kitchen making tea. He was a bit puzzled as to how he was going to explain his relationship to Misaki when he didn't fully understand it himself. He loved his

Yuki how to explain the dynamics of their relationship would be difficult for anyone else to understand. He wasn't willing to divulge Yuki's past it was a trust that Yuki had placed in him

and one that he would rather die then betray.

Setting the tea on the table beside the bed Shuichi sat on the side of the bed and took a deep breathe.

"When Yuki was a young boy, younger then we are now, he was traumatised in a similar way as you were. I won't go into details and break his trust in me."

"That's ok but I understand."

Shuichi smiled his thanks and nodded before continuing. "Last night was hard on Yuki. Your sleep was very restless and filled with bad dreams. Each time you groaned or whimpered in

pain it tore at Yuki's heart. When he tried to comfort you you cried out in pain calling for your … landlord." Shuichi smiled at Misaki when he said that and grinned as Misaki blushed a deep

red.

"Yuki couldn't cope with that. It brought back memories that he is still struggling to deal with himself. When he can't cope he hides, locks himself away. I understand him. I don't fully

understand how but because I do I know that he's really trying to escape and hide. He's not angry at me but rather at his memories. At his inability to cope and deal with his memories.

When he said not to come home it was his way of telling me that he needed space to come to terms with his feelings and emotions. His calling me a brat is a pet name, like one would call

their partner honey, or sweetheart, or in your case...Usagi-san. Calling me a brat is also another indicator that he's not angry with me."

The phone rang and Shuichi stood up to answer it. "That will be him now."

"Eh?"

Shuichi picked up the phone and began talking. It didn't take long for Misaki to realise that Shuichi had been right. Listening unashamedly, Misaki heard Shuichi reassure his lover that he

was okay. Shuichi then went on to ask how Yuki was and Misaki smiled as he heard his friend fussing over Yuki like a mother hen. Shuichi was smiling with love as he hanged up the

phone.

"Usagi-san called me a brat." Misaki said sadly. "But it's not a pet name for him. He's never called me that before."

"Misaki in every relationship there are going to be times when your angry with your partner, your brother, and even your parents. Just because your angry with someone it doesn't mean

you don't love them. You get angry with Usagi-san sometimes don't you?"

Misaki took a few minutes to think. Whilst he was thinking Shuichi picked up the cups and when to wash them. Misaki remembered how angry he had been with his brother when he had

told Usagi and himself that he was getting married. Shuichi was right just because he had been angry didn't lessen the love he had for his brother. He knew there were many times when

Usagi annoyed him or angered him but he did still love him. That love never changed, never lessened but rather it grew and developed.

"Your right," Misaki told Shuichi. "You can be angry with someone that you love."

"Are you ready to call your Usagi-san?" Shuichi asked.

Misaki hung his head sadly. If only that was all it was. There was still that letter. That cursed letter that had shattered his heart. If it was only that Usagi-san had been angry with him

then he wouldn't have left in the first place. That letter destroyed his life.

****************************************************

Thanks to all those who've placed this story on their alerts - I have to stop myself from cackling with delight anyone story alerts it. I am sooo easy to please

Thanks especially to those who've commented - I almost have to be sedated each time I get one as I get so excited. I am sooo pitiful

Sorry this has been so long to add. I hope it continues to please. Please let me know what you think. I plan to reveal the letter tomorrow but it is hard. I am no good at romantic letter writing so bear with me. I think I may

have dug a really big hole for myself there. Oh well be kind to me. Please. Please. Please. ;)


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Don't own either Gravitation or JJ Romantic.

Chapter 8

Here it was. His hand shook as he pulled the single sheet of paper from between the pages of the book Shinobu had found under the bed. His legs gave out on him and he fell to the bed.

Despite all his bravado Shinobu found that his entire body was now shaking. He was breathing in rapid shallow breaths.

His head jerked up as he heard his lovers deep voice followed by a loud screech coming from Hiroki the demon. He was tempted, so tempted, to rush downstairs to rescue his lover from

the demons clutches but he couldn't seem to move. He sat staring at the folded paper.

It had clearly been scrunched into a ball then flattened out again so that the reader could re-read the letter. Shinobu wondered how many times Misaki tortured himself reading this

letter.

Finally the terrorist within him won the battle hand with trembling hands he opened the letter. The first thing that struck him was the beautiful penmanship which was marred in various

spots where the ink had clearly bled into the paper as it reacted with water. Tears, Shinobu thought to himself, Misaki had been crying whilst reading this letter.

Shinobu hesitated again before reading. This letter had caused his friend some severe pain and the emotion he felt for his friend welled up within him making it hard for him to breath.

Taking a deep breath to calm himself he began to read.

"Dear _Akihiko_

It's finally over. The five years I promised your father to stay away from you are over. How I have longed to return to your side. I have cursed myself many times for agreeing to his terms.

I have dreamed many times of holding you once more within my arms. The sweet scent of your body filling my nostrils as we made love. Your soft skin reacting so deliciously to my touch.

The sound of you passionate moans. Even as I write this the heat builds in my lower regions.

Your father informs me that there is a young teenager seeking to take you away from me. I believe his name is Misaki. How I have come to hate that name. Please say it isn't so.

I know how you crave for human contact after years of being denied it by your parents and the distance you felt from your brother. These five years would have been torture to you after

our closeness. I do not believe that Misaki would continue to bother you if he understood what a problem he is causing. I hope he goes quietly and does not become a nuisance.

He is young and he does not have the maturity to truly love you as I do. I don't believe he understands how his actions must already be causing problems. Your father has told me how

you are tolerating his behaviour out of pity for the boy. Your kindness has always been one of the things I have loved so much about you.

Please my love let me know if I still hold a place in your heart. I am a coward I know but after waiting so many years to be with you, to hold you, to love you, I find I can not face you with

a new love in your life. If _Misaki_ has found a place in your heart, know I will not return. However, if you love me still I will be within your arms within a few days never to leave them ever

again.

Loving you always

Akiro"

Shinobu stared at the letter for a few moments. He brought his hand up to rub his eyes only to be shocked by the discovery that tears were already falling.

If he was crying himself, he who had no emotions involved, he could imagine the sheer pain and anguish Misaki had felt reading such a shockingly passionate letter. If his Miyagi had

received such a letter than Shinobu knew that he would feel like his life was not worth living.

He was also curious. Why didn't Misaki fight for Akihiko? He hadn't thought Misaki the type to roll over and slink away with just a letter. Didn't he have any confidence in Akihiko's love for

him? Did he really believe that Akihiko didn't love him? Why would he think that way?

As he looked around the room for Misaki's phone charger he began to get angry. This letter was addressed to Akihiko from a man who clearly felt confident in his love. Did Akihito love this

Akiro? Was Misaki really a replacement? Not for his brother but for this man. By the time Shinobu placed the charger in his pocket and stomped to the bedroom door he was furious. He

had never felt so angry in his entire life, with the one exception of his lovers marriage to his sister.

He flung open the bedroom door then stood at the top of the stairs and yelled at Akihito sitting talking quietly with the other two men. The very sight of him was making him sick to the

stomach. This man had hurt his friend Misaki so very very badly and now Shinobu was going to make him pay.

"Akihiko you bastard. You care to explain this?"

*******

I hope I haven't let you guys down with the letter. I have a horrible thought that I buillt it up too much in earlier chapters only to disappoint with the result. If I have my sincerest

grovelling. Please forgive its also a bit short. Letter me know what you thought of the letter – I so sucked at that. I don't know if Akiro is even a name so bear with it if its meaning is

confusing.


	9. Chapter 9

Don't own Gravitation or JJ Romantica. But boy do I love the writer and artist sooo much.

**Chapter 9**

"Care to explain this you bastard"

The men looked up at the irate teenager standing at the top of the stairs waving what they took to be the letter in question. Akihiko stood up as the teenager stomped his way towards him. It took all of his self control to stop himself from retreating. He looked over at Myagi a hint of amazement at the man's ability to live with the explosive teenager in his violet eyes.

Akihiko took the letter from Shinobu's outstretched hand and began to read it. He slumped back onto the couch as he took in its contents.

"To my beloved _Akihiko,......"_

"I don't understand," he muttered out loud.

"What's not to understand? You can read can't you. You are what passes as a writer." Shinobu snapped at the dazed man.

"I can read it," Akihiko said defensively. "What I can't understand are the contents?"

"I thought they were pretty self explanatory myself, nauseating mushy, but simple to follow." Shinobu shot back in disgust. "It's a letter from your lover telling you that he's coming back to what he appears to believe a long awaited reunion with you. It clearly indicates that he knows about Misaki but that he was sure he wouldn't be a bother once he saw how much you and your lost love belonged to each other."

"That's what I don't get. Akito and I never had that kind of relationship. We were friends no more." Akihiko defended himself. "And do you honestly think that my feelings towards Misaki are fake."

Shinobu stopped. He remembered the looks that passed between Misaki and Akihiko. They were genuine. So was the look of total despair that fell over Akihiko's face when he realised the Misaki hadn't been at the door earlier. He took a deep breath and attempted to think.

"Sorry Akihiko. Your right. That letter threw me. I bet it sent Misaki right up the wall as well. Not that he doesn't trust your feelings but the hint that he was a bother would have blinded him to anything else." Shinobu apologized humbly.

"I almost disgusted myself when I first started reading that piece of dribble."

Shinobu thought about the letter some more. This time more calmly.

"Does Misaki usually open your mail?"

"No he never does. He says he doesn't want to intrude on my work. When he brings them up to my office they are always still sealed."

"Which means that the letter, though clearly addressed to you, was sent to Misaki on purpose." Shinobu muttered in outrage. "Someone clearly wanted to separate Misaki from you."

"That's if it was written to Akihiko," Kamijou stated over by the window. He had been holding the letter up to the light whilst Shinobu and Akihiko had been talking.

"Kamijou have you found something?" Myagi asked his colleague.

"The letter appears to be genuine; however, I don't believe the intended recipient had been Akihiko. It looks like someone has erased the original name and inserted Akihiko's name. The writing is different and the ink is slightly darker than the rest of the letter."

"So we've got a forged letter deliberately sent to Misaki. I know that would have hurt Misaki but to get him to leave there needed to be another push. Akihiko when Misaki came home you said he had begun yelling what about. What had set Misaki off?"

Akihiko leaned back and thought about the argument. He didn't want to remember the harsh words he had said to his beloved Misaki.

"Oh…my…God," he said stunned.

"What?…What?" Shinobu asked impatiently.

"Akito was visiting. I hadn't seen him since my last trip to England. I had gone there to visit my tutor with Haruhiko. We were laughing about some silly thing Haruhiko had done when we were kids. had done when Misaki came home. He seemed fine until I introduced him to Akito. Akito also seemed a little upset when I mentioned Misaki's name. But Misaki! I had never seen him so emotionally upset. I had to send him up to his room. I was afraid that he would say something that he would regret bitterly later. You know how Misaki doesn't want his emotions to be a problem for others. When I explained to Akito that Misaki was my lover Akito seemed to be relieved and left shortly afterwards. I was going to speak to Misaki but decided to give him some time to cool off first. But then he disappeared the next day."

"God what a mess." Shinobu sighed. "Someone sends Misaki a letter that's made to look like it's from a lover to you. Then he comes home and said lover is laughing with you. He's then sent to his room and you don't come and comfort him but rather stay downstairs with the 'lover'. No wonder he flipped out. To him it must have seemed like the letter was confirmed. He was no longer loved by you but clearly had become a burden. He probably thought that he was doing the right thing by you in leaving. We all know how obsessed he is with never allowing his own selfishness to become a burden on anybody, especially you Akihiko."

"Who sent the letter though?" Myagi asked.

Akihiko and Kamijou looked at each other, "Haruhiko." The muttered angrily at the same time.

Akihiko rose angrily from the couch and made his way to the front door. "I am going to kill that bastard. How dare he hurt my Misaki. I knew I should not have trusted his attempts at bridging the gap that has separated us all our lives. Misaki was even supporting the truce between us."

"Ah, Akihiko, don't you think you should shower first?" Myagi asked.

"No," interrupted Shinobu abruptly.

"Heh!" Myagi exclaimed.

"If his family are truly concerned about him then he should go as his is. They need a visual prompt as to what will become of Akihiko without Misaki here to look after him. Besides it gives him a really awesome dangerous look. If family love doesn't work then intimidation might."

Akihiko smiled savagely at Shinobu, who couldn't prevent a slight shiver of fear race up his spine, before racing out the door.

By the time Akihiko pulled up to the family home he was raging. How dare they continue to interfere in his relationship with Misaki. They had gone too far. In hurting Misaki they were bordering on a total cut off of relationships between them and himself. He would never forgive them if anything happened to Misaki as a result of this. Never.

He marched into the house.

"Where is he?" He angrily asked the butler.

"Where's who sir?" The butler politely enquired.

"That good for nothing brother of mine"

"Oh, he's in his bedroom…"The butler began to inform him. "Oil you can't go up there he's got a visitor."

Akihiko raced up the stairs to his brother's room. He had better not have Misaki in there with him he fumed as he burst through the bedroom doors. The room was darkened and it took him a few minutes for his eyes to become adjusted. In the meantime two men sat up in the canopied double bed staring at him in shock.

"Akito," Akihiko asked in surprise. "What are you doing here? Wait up don't answer that."

"Just what is the meaning of this," Haruhiko demanded attempting to retain some form of composure.

"That's what I want to know," Akihiko said as he gave the letter to his brother.

"Wait up this is the letter Aki wrote to me but it's got your name on it," Haruhiko stated with a stunned look on his face as he passed the letter to the man beside him.

"Yes I wrote this but I didn't write your name on it Akihiko. Someone has changed it." Akito confirmed.

"Give us a minute to change and we'll meet you in the living room downstairs." Haruhiko said giving Akito a swift kiss before getting out of bed and quickly pulling on his cloths.

"Okay, but don't be long," Akihiko warned. Now that he had confronted his brother it looked as though he had once again reached a dead end. Haruhiko looked as though this was all new to him.

True to his word Haruhiko and Akito walked into the living room within five minutes of Akihiko's arrival.

"Where did you get this letter?" Haruhiko asked puzzled.

"Someone had sent it to Misaki," Akihiko replied angrily.

"Misaki," Haruhiko said giving Akito a quick look and an apologetic smile.

"It's alright Haruhiko I understand about Misaki now." Akito reassured him.

"Wait a minute has something happened to Misaki? Where is he?" Haruhiko asked a soft growl showing in his voice. He may not love Misaki but Misaki was still very special to him. Not only had he shown him that he could follow his dreams professionally but also there had been a softening of the barrier that had separated him from Akihiko.

"Gone. Missing. He ran away."

"What!!" Haruhiko and Akito exclaimed. "When?"

"Thursday night or early Friday." Akihiko admitted slumping into a chair.

"What, after my visit!" Akito exclaimed clearly distressed that his visit would result in this. "Oh..my..God. Receiving that letter and then finding me reminiscing in his apartment – no wonder he was upset. Hell, I would be ready to toss in the towel myself and I'm an adult."

"Have you rung the Hospitals, Police and the … morgue?" Haruhiko asked his brother gently.

"Yes, yes and oh God, yes." Akihiko answered pain clear in his voice on the final affirmation. Ringing the morgue had been the hardest thing he had ever done in his entire life.

"I'm sorry," his brother said softly, hesitantly reaching out his hand towards the brother that he had felt so distanced from his entire life.

Akito smiled gently to himself as he saw Akihito meet his brother halfway and gently grasp Haruhiko's hand within his own. He reached for his Haruhiko as he saw the beginnings of tears forming in his eyes. He knew Haruhiko had long wanted a closer relationship with his brother but had felt bound by the relationship between the parents.

"But who sent the letter? And why?" Akihiko shouted out in frustration.

The door to the sitting room opened.

"I did."

* * * * *

Sorry it has taken so long but my hard-drive in the computer decided to take an unauthorised vacation. So I decided to give it a permanent one. Now I hope things will be on track. I hope the above pleased you all. Thanks to those who commented. I must say getting reviews and story alerts is such an out of this world buzz so thanks to you all. I hope I haven't disappointed you. Am starting on the next chapter straight away.


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry, and you can't imagine how sorry I am, that I didn't write JJ Romantic or Gravitation. I would love to meet whoever did. I grovel sincerely at their feet in homage.

CHAPTER 10

Nowaki was tired. Not just the "I need a nap tired" but the tired that could be felt deep down in the very marrow of his bones. He could barely manage to put one foot in front of the

other. Every now and then he stumbled over imaginary obstacles.

It was dark and so very cold. Lifting the collar of his thick jacket to protect the back of his neck from the night chill he looked up at the darkened apartment block where he lived.

Alone light, from his living room window, shone brightly like a lighthouse beacon calling him home. His back straightened and he sighed with joy as he felt new strength flowing though his

body at the thought that he would soon be in the arms of his lover.

"I'm back," he cried out joyously as the burst through the apartment door.

The new strength he had gained looking up at his lit window slowly drained out of him as there was no response to his call, no lover's arms to fall into. There was no warmth in the

apartment at all. Looking around him he noticed the note he had left for his Hiro-san was still sitting underneath the crystal vase. The only difference being the flowers, which had been so

full of life when he had left for work, were now drooping lifelessly.

He had not seen his Hiro-san for two days now. He had had to return to work Monday, prior to Hiro-san returning from the university, due to an emergency. When he had returned early

Tuesday morning Hiro-san had already left for work and he had not returned by the time Nowaki had had to return to work himself.

It was now the early hours of Thursday morning. Where was his Hiro-san? Had something happened to his beloved? What the hell was going on?

Looking around he noticed the light blinking on the answering machine. Hoping for some message from Hiro-san he pressed the play button.

The first message was from his work and then another was from the flower shop where he used to work and even now filled in occasionally as a favour to the owner. Suddenly he heard

Akihiko's voice over the phone. It sounded desperate and needy. Nowaki held his breath as he listened. Suddenly he heard his lover's voice cut in.

"Hiroki are you there? For God's sake pick up? I can't live without …. I need …."

Nowaki frowned at the desperation he heard in Akihito's voice. Although he had had only brief encounters with Akihito he still was not comfortable with his relationship with his lover. He

knew that Hiro-san was his but he also knew that Akihito was his childhood friend and his first love. He lived in fear of losing his lover to Akihito. Whenever the two met or spoke he could

feel his uncertainties and insecurities well up and threaten to drown him. Would he really be chosen if Akihito called out for Hiroki's love? Now it looked as if his worst nightmare had come

to be.

"Akihito, I'm here. I'm on my way? I'll be at your apartment in five minutes. Don't do anything until I get there. I'll be with you soon." Fear began to claw at Nowaki's heart as he heard his

lover respond. Was that eagerness he heard in his voice?

"Thank you Hiroki. Thank you. (A sob could be clearly heard in his voice) Come quickly, quickly. I need you so much."

A red haze seemed to come over Nowaki's eyes like a curtain. His mind went blank. As from a distance he heard sounds like paper ripping and porcelain smashing. There was a loud rapid

thump thump thump beating in his ears. Soon he realized it was the sound of his heart beating.

**CRASH **Nowaki looked about bewildered. The answering machine lay smashed against the living room floor. He looked from where it lay in pieces to where it usually was situated for a

few minutes puzzled. Books lay scattered and torn all over the floor. The coffee table was overturned and there were pieces of smashed ornaments lying in the corner. It was like a

typhoon had gone through the living room.

Slowly it dawned on him that he was responsible. He was shocked. Horrified. Never before had he felt such a savage anger. An unbearable inconsolable despair began welling up within

his body. His heart felt as though it was physically breaking.

He stumbled to his bedroom and collapsed on the bed. The bed which he had experienced unbelievable happiness in the arms of his beloved Hiro-san. He curled up into a tight ball and

began to cry as if his heart was breaking and his very soul was being ripped from his body. He didn't hear the door to the apartment open. He didn't hear his beloved's voice calling out a

greeting. All he heard was his life falling apart to the sound of his harsh raw sobbing.

As Hiroki opened the door to the apartment the first thing he saw was the answering machine shattered against the living room wall. His heart stopped.

"What the hell," he thought to himself as he starred stunned at the pile of broken plastic and wires. Entering the loungroom he saw the books scattered about the floor. The overturned

coffee table and the shattered ornaments.

"What the hell…" He thought stunned. The past few days spent in fear for Misaki was nothing compared to the sudden fear that he felt for his lover.

Where was he? Maybe he was at work. Just as he breathed a sigh of relief a sound came to him. A sound filled with such pain and despair. It was coming from the room he shared with

his love.

He rushed to the room and burst through the door. Standing for a few minutes in the doorway he looked about the room. It was tidy as usual, not like the loungeroom had been. There

on the bed he saw his beloved but not like he had ever seen him before.

His usually ever cheerful lover was curled into a tight ball and rocking himself back and forth. His eyes filled not with joy and laughter but with tears and despair.

"N..Nowaki?" Hiroki asked stunned. Was this really his lover? It is not possible. What could have happened that was so bad that it would reduce is lover to this ball of misery?

Hiroki walked slowly to Nowaki's side. He did not seem to respond to Hiroki's presence at all. It was as if Nowaki was in a horrifying world of his own and one which Hiroki could not

breach.

Hiroki had never been so scared in all of his life. What was going on in the world? First Misaki runs away from the man he adored and now his Nowaki was this..this..there was no word to

describe the depths of despair Nowaki seemed to be stuck in.

He rushed the last few metres to Nowaki's side and began to shout his name and shake his shoulders hoping desperately for some sign of response from his lover.

* * *

Sorry it's been a while. I hope this is okay. Let me know. I get such a buzz when I read your comments. I'm sorry, I am just soooo needy. :)


	11. Chapter 11

I didn't write either Gravitation or JJ Romantica. I only hope to not tarnish them.

Nowaki felt trapped within his despair. His whole world felt like it was crumbling around him. His oldest fear seemed to be coming true. His Hiro-san was finally able to be with Akihiko. He

knew the day would come when Akihiko would steal Hiroki from him. After all didn't he have more to offer Hiroki than a man who had not even been wanted by his own mother? If his own

mother didn't want him why on earth would anyone one as special as Hiroki. All these years of trying to catch up with Hiro-san, trying stand as an equal by his lover's side, were for

nothing.

Slowly he became aware of his lover's voice. It seemed to be calling him from a long way away. He felt drawn by the desperation he could clearly be heard in his voice. His stubborn,

proud, lover was begging. Why? What was he saying? It was his name. Hiro-san was calling his name.

Nowoki couldn't open his eyes. He didn't want to know that the arms he felt about him, or the voice he heard calling him, were all hallucinations brought on by his own despair. His crying

slowed then stopped altogether as he tried to wrap himself in the words his lover was saying. The arms about him tightened as if their owner feared that Nowaki would disappear or run

away.

After what felt like hours Nowoki finally opened his eyes and found himself looking straight into the eyes of his lover. His lover's usually warm brown eyes were filled with fear and floating

in a bed of tears. Tear tracks could be clearly seen travelling down his cheeks.

"Wh..wh…what are you doing here?" Nowaki asked in despair.

"Eh…I live here." Hiroki answered puzzled. "Are you alright Nowaki? What happened? Did someone hurt you? Should I call the hospital? The police?"

"You did," Nowaki replied despondently.

"Huh…I did…what?? You're not making any sense Nowaki."

"I heard the phone call from Akihiko. I heard your eagerness to be with him. I know you haven't been home since. You've left me haven't you? You finally have your Akihiko just as you

have always wanted." Nowaki's voice began rising with each sentence. A hint of hysteria could be heard intertwined with despair.

"Whoa, Nowaki, what are you talking about? I am right here. I have no intentions of ever leaving you."

"But you love Akihiko. You've always wanted him and now he wants you."

"You're wrong Nowaki."

"I'm not wrong. When we first met you were crying because of him, because he did not return your love."

Hiroki sighed deeply. He should have had this conversation with Nowaki a long time ago. He silently cursed his pride.

"Ah...I've always wanted to talk to you about Akihiko but each time I've brought him up in conversation I could see you freeze in fear. I am sorry I am such a coward. I should have told

you earlier." Hiroki said sadly.

Nowaki pulled himself out of Hiroki's arms and scooted to the other side of the bed as if to escape from Hiroki's words. He didn't want to hear about Akihiko. He didn't want to hear Hiroki

tell him why he was leaving him. Right now he didn't even want to live.

"Nowaki it is true that when we met I was crying over my unrequited love."

"I already knew that. I don't really need to hear this."

"But you do need to hear this," Hiroki continued. "I was wrong."

"Huh," Nowaki asked puzzled slightly leaning forward. "What do you mean?"

"I've never been really good at expressing my feelings in words. I've always relied on actions. I've always thought that was enough. I'm sorry I was wrong." Hiroki muttered in self-

disgust.

"Huh," Nowoki muttered crawling slowly towards his lover.

"It wasn't long after I met you that I began to realize...." Hiroki stopped turning his face away from Nowoki. He sighed and then gulped.

"Began to realize....what?"

Hiroki turned back to Nowaki. His face flushed a dark red. "What I felt for Akihito...."

"Yes...yes?" Nowaki was now close enough to Hiroki to touch him but he kept his hands clenched in the blankets.

"What I felt for Akihiko....." Hiroki repeated. Then whispering he continued, "Didn't compare to what I felt for you."

"Huh? What was that?" Nowaki asked leaning in so close that Hiroki could feel his breathe gently caress his skin. "Tell me again."

Hiroki turned to look deep into Nowaki's blue eyes. "I love you Nowaki. What I felt for Akihiko does not compare to what I feel for you. The feelings for Akihiko are like... like how one feels

for a brother. Compared to that you've always excited me. Just being in the same room makes me hard. I find myself getting hot during my lectures just at the mere thought of you. You

need to take responsibility, Nowaki. I've embarrassed myself many times during class because you've popped into my head."

Nowaki pulled Hiroki to him and wrapped his arms about him.

"Akihiko is still important to me He's been my friend since childhood." Hiroki continued carefully. He didn't want to upset Nowaki, or make him feel sad, but he didn't want to have to

choose between his lover and his best friend. He knew he would choose Nowaki but he wouldn't be happy about it and in the end that would taint their relationship. "It is you that I love.

Even if Akihiko begged me to love him I would turn him down with no hesitation."

Nowaki sighed gently. "I'm sorry, Hiro-san. I've been jealous; it seems, of my own misconception. I thought that you still had hidden feelings for Akihiko. Now that I understand how you

truly feel I find myself feeling foolish over the whole thing."

Hiroki pulled himself away from his lovers embrace and went to stand by the window. He pushed the lace curtains aside and placed his hand on the cold glass as he stared out into the

darkness.

"Hiro-san? What is it?" Nowaki asked puzzled.

"Why do you to that? Why do you think it?" Hiroki asked his lover as he continued to gaze out into the darkness.

"Hiro-san? I don't understand. What are you talking about?"

"We've been together for almost a ten years and yet you still thought that I had those kinds of feelings towards Akihiko. It is almost like you don't believe that you are worthy of love.

Why do you feel that you don't deserve to be by my side? You are always pushing yourself to work harder to reduce some gap that you perceive to be between my worth and your own.

As if you don't reduce that gap I will leave you behind. That you, as you are, are not the kind of man that would hold me with you forever."

"Hiro-san...I....uh..." Nowaki rose unsteadily to his feet and stood beside his lover. "I...its...I..."

"I have my own theories on that. Do you want to hear them?" Hiroki asked gently as he turned away from the window and looked into the blue eyes of his Nowaki. He saw fear in those

eyes and a hint of self loathing.

"Um..er...yes," Nowaki answered on a soft sigh.

"I think it all comes back to how you arrived at the orphanage." Hiroki said gently reaching out to hold Nowaki in his arms.

Nowaki's face went pale. His large body began to tremble. Then he collapsed to the floor taking Hiroki with him. Large tears began to form in Nowaki's eyes.

"I...I...I was abandoned."

Hiroki pulled Nowaki tightly towards him. Gently running his fingers through his lover's hair he continued. "I can't even begin to imagine what it was like to be abandoned by your family

and left to be raised by strangers. I think you focus too much on being abandoned and not enough on what you achieved despite this."

"Eh?"

"You are a man that has surpassed his past and made a life worthy of anyone. I am an associate professor; with my family background it is not hard to achieve that. You, however, have

become a doctor with no family supports to assist you. You save lives, I merely educate them. I'm not trying to demean my own achievements but show you that you have achieved so

much more because you have had more obstacles which you hand to overcome to achieve them. You are always telling me that it is okay for me to boast about my achievements but you

never boast about yours. You never seem to realize your own accomplishments. You have accomplished more than me."

Nowaki was silent for a few moments as he thought about Hiroki's words. He wasn't confident to believe them himself but to think that his Hiro-san thought such wonderful things about

him made him feel more confident in Hiro-sans declaration of love.

Half an hour later found Nowaki sitting on the bed leaning against the wall. In his long arms he held his lover who sat between his legs leaning against his chest.

"Um, Hiro-san," Nowaki softly asked hesitantly.

"Yes,"

"Um, what did Akihito want?"

Hiroki tensed for a second before realizing that Nowaki had remained relaxed. For the first time Nowaki had spoken Akihito's name with no tension in his body. Hiroki sighed gently with

relief and relaxed, snuggling deeper into Nowaki.

"You know that student I've been going on about in my class?"

"Taki something?"

"Yes, Takahashi Found out at the end of last year that he was Akihiko's little lover."

"Eh. He has a lover??"

"I haven't told you that before? Damn I thought we were working on our communication issues. Anyway he's gone missing. There was a misunderstanding brought about by some

mischief makers and he's run away. Akihiko is frantic. He can't live without his Misaki. As for Takahashi he adores his Usagi-san. It is very worrying."

"What did you just call them?"Tension flowing into Nowaki's body.

"Akihiko and Takahashi." concerned at the renewed tension in Nowaki's body.

"No the other names"

"Misaki and Usagi-san. Why?"

"I think I know where he is." Nowaki muttered to himself outloud.

"Where?" Hiroki asked excitedly turning to face his lover with hope blazing in his eyes.

"I'm sorry Hiro-san. I can't tell you."

* * *

I hope you like this installment. Let me know. If I don't write again before Christmas I hope you all hav a great one. Lots of love, lots of laughter and oh, lets not forget lots of presents.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year one and all.


	12. Chapter 12

Didn't write Gravitation or JJ Romantica. Would love to meet those who did though. So jealous.

Chapter 12

"But who sent the letter? And why?" Akihiko shouted out in despair slamming his fist down on the armrest in frustration.

The door to the sitting room opened unnoticed by the three men. Each of them trapped in their own thoughts of sorrow regarding the disappearance of Misaki. Akihiko lost in thoughts of despair at never seeing his lover again. Haruhiko felt torn between fear for Misaki's safety, feelings of love that he still felt for the boy, and guilt for those same feelings. Akita, who had only met Misaki for a very brief time, felt horrified and angered that his letter of love to Haruhiko had been twisted and used against an innocent young man.

"I did," a soft timid voice answered causing the three men to whip around to face the new arrivals.

The brothers were surprised when they saw their father standing just inside the door with Akihiko's mother standing beside him. Akihiko's mother had always been a cold and distant parent as they had grown up. She had seemed to derive some sort of bizarre pleasure out of the antagonism between them.

Their father led Akihiko's mother to a nearby chair and sat down beside her. Her hand held gently within his own. The two brothers stared at them in shock. It was well known that there was no love lost between them but at the moment they almost appeared to be affectionate towards each other.

"Your mother sent the letter," Akihiko's father said tiredly.

"What the hell…" Akihiko said angrily as he turned to face his mother.

"Careful Akihiko," his father warned him.

"Do you have any idea as to what she's done?" Akihiko said as he contemptuously looked at his mother. "Misaki has disappeared."

"What?" His mother said shocked. Tears running down her beautiful pale face. "What have I done? Oh, God forgive me."

"He may but if anything happens to Misaki I sure as hell won't?" Akihiko snapped at the woman who gave birth to him but who had always denied him her love.

"Akihiko!" his father snapped at him as he gathered his tearful wife in his arms to comfort her.

"No, he's right." His mother said sadly pulling away from her husband and looking up at her angry son. "I was so bitter regarding certain things that I acted like a child and hurt two innocent children who had been placed in my care. And here I am still hurting them."

"Why?" Haruhiko asked of the crying woman before him shocked. "Why did you send that letter to Misaki? Why would you destroy such a beautiful innocent young man? One which, quite clearly, was giving such joy and happiness to your own son."

Haruhiko had always been jealous of Akihiko. Akihiko who lived with both his mother and father. Not like himself who was merely the son of his father and a mistress. A son that was not wanted and was barely tolerated. He had always felt that Akihiko had everything whilst he had had a begrudged existence. Could it be that he had been wrong all these years? Had Akihiko also been merely tolerated by their parents. Why did these people have children if they did not want to love them and care for them? Could it be that he had been mistaken all his life and it wasn't his fault after all that he wasn't loved. The anger he had always felt towards Akihiko began to dissolve.

He looked across at Akihiko, not with eyes filled with jealousy based on childhood experiences, but with the eyes of an adult. He didn't see the man he had always believed had looked down on him as the merely son of his father's mistress. He no longer saw arrogance and disdain. What he had seen as arrogance had really been a protective shield. A shield he had developed to protect his sensitive spirit from the cold and distant treatment of those that were supposed to love him.

"Oh, God," he thought to himself as the he remembered the way he himself had enjoyed emotionally torturing Akihiko as they grew up. "What have I done?"

He raised his hand to his chest as his heart felt as though it was being squeezed in a vice. Tears began to well up in his eyes as he remembered how he had always withheld himself from Akihiko. Just as he felt the first stirrings of self loathing writhe inside him he felt warm arms wrap around him from behind. Turning his head he looked up into the compassionate brown eyes of his lover.

"Haruhiko, it's alright. You were a child. You didn't understand what was going on around you. You were desperate for love yourself and were merely lashing out in anger when it was denied to you."

Overhearing these words Akihiko turned away from his mother and looked at his estranged older brother who was being comforted by Akita. Haruhiko saw his brother come towards him and pressed himself further into Akita's arms. He couldn't look at Akihiko. He felt too ashamed.

He jumped, startled, when he felt a large unfamiliar cold hand rest on his head and gently ruffle his hair.

"Haruhiko." A soft gentle voice spoke to him. He barely recognised it as Akihiko's.

"Akita is right. We were children who followed the example of our parents in what family life is like. We weren't shown affection so how could we show it to each other. Our parents guided our actions as children but we are adults now. We both have partners who have accepted us and with their acceptance have taught us that we can be loved and what love really is. All we have to do is to expand that feeling to include those who are important to us. I am sorry too for how I have treated you in the past. Please forgive me and let's be brothers like Misaki and Takahiro are. The brothers that we should have been. That we can be." Akihiko's voice broke over the last few words.

Haruhiko felt Akita squeeze him tightly in unspoken support before his arms released him. His chest remained pressed up against his back and Haruhiko knew that Akita would still love him and support him no matter what his response to Akihiko's words were.

He took a deep breath to steady himself before looking into Akihiko's eyes. He gasped in shock. His brother's usually cold aloof eyes were filled with fear and hope swimming in a bed of unshed tears. One solitary tear fell and slowly trailed down his pale cheek as Haruhiko stepped away from his lover and into the arms of a brother that he had felt distanced from all his life.

He didn't know how long he stood there in his brother's arms but he still felt it was too soon for Akihiko to release him and he felt a soft whimper leave his mouth.

Akihiko raised his chin gently and looked into his eyes. "It's okay Haruhiko. We will have more time to get reacquainted as brothers once Misaki is found. First I want a word with my mother." Anger could clearly be heard in rising in his voice as he turned to once more to glare at his mother.

"Why would you do this?" He snarled.

Lady Usami straightened in her chair her pale face determined as she prepared to receive whatever punishment was meted out to her.

"Akihiko, I am so sorry."

"I don't want to hear how sorry you are. I want to know why you are trying to destroy me. Why you would hurt someone you don't even know just to get back at me? Why don't you love me?" Akihiko cried out in pain and anger.

"I am ashamed to say that I used you children as a weapon against your father. What makes it even worst is that it wasn't necessary. If it wasn't for a meeting Misaki I would still be living that kind of life."

"Misaki?!" Akihiko asked astounded. "Where?"

The other two male members of the Usami family looked at each other, raised their right eyebrows, before saying simultaneously. "Train station?"

"How did you know that?" Lady Usami asked surprised.

"Let's just say it's a new family tradition that Misaki introduced." Haruhiko said smiling gently to himself. A smile shared by his father.

"As Misaki would say 'damn Usami-pheromones'." Akihiko mumbled to himself lost for a few minutes in his own thoughts.

There was a strained silence as each person thought of how Misaki had touched their lives. They each reflected on how Misaki, in the course of just two years, had turned strangers into a family. Slowly each family looked at Akihiko.

The man in question was still sitting on the lounge lost in thought. His hair ruffled and his chin showing signs of needing a shave – two days ago. His face was pale and gaunt. His cloths were creased and clearly in need of a change. His eyes, which had been lit with joy, over the past two years were now haunted and dulled.

"I can't tell you how sorry it ended up like this. After talking to Misaki I talked to your father, I mean really talked. I completely forget about the letter. I only remembered it when Tanaka informed us of your arrival. I should have remembered to tell Misaki about the letter. How have you been holding up? You haven't been wallowing in your apartment alone have you?"

Akihiko head snapped up and he opened his mouth as if to snap again at his mother. Then he took a closer look at his mother and saw how she had genuinely changed and how she was suffering now under the consequences of her actions. He couldn't blame her anymore.

"Hiroki-san has been with me almost constantly since Misaki disappeared." He answered softly. "He is also Misaki's teacher at the University."

"Hiroki? Do I know him? I think I do. Isn't he the son of the family that lived nearby?" Lady Usami asked softly. Relief and joy at Akihiko's unspoken forgiveness clearly visible on her beautiful pale face.

Akihiko reached for his wallet and pulled out a photo, reluctantly given to him by his friend, and passed it too his mother.

His mother reached out a trembling pale hand and gently took the photo from her son's hand. She looked at the person Akihiko indicated.

"I remember him now. He was such a proud young man. I liked him." Lady Usami looked at the person standing beside Hiroki in the photo then gasped. "Oh dear, please excuse me for a moment."

"What is it ... mother?" Akihiko asked.

Lady Usami gave her son a trembling smile, tears welling in her eyes. "Nothing dear I just need to attend to something. Tanaka please assist me."

"At once, my lady." The tall butler responded opening the door and following her out.

Once outside the room Lady Usami stopped and placed a hand gently on the butlers arm. "Tanaka please come with me into the study."

"My lady?" The butler enquired puzzled at his employers casual attitude towards him.

"Oh Tanaka, for the final time call me Yuri. We have been friends for years. For crying out loud you are the husband of my best friend."

"Sorry Yuri. Professional ethics and all that." He complied with a smile.

"This is regarding a personal matter so it shouldn't be covered by your 'Professional Ethics'." Lady Usami replied with a light carefree laugh.

Tanaka looked at Yuri with puzzled eyes.

They entered the study and Yuri sat in a comfortable chair and indicated that Tanaka was to take the seat next to her. Once he was seated she handed him the photo that she had taken from Akihiko.

After throwing Yuri a quick look he glanced down at the photo. He glanced at the photo then looked up again at Yuri. Suddenly his eyes when wide and he looked back at the photograph again. His face went pale as he continued to gaze down at the photo.

"You can see it can't you, Tanaka?" She asked him excitedly.

Tanaka swallowed then looked up at Yuri. "Yes. Do you think it's possible? After all these years."

It was almost painful to see and hear the hope in Tanaka's voice and on his still handsome face.

"We need more information about him." Yuri stated firmly.

"We need to speak to him in person."

"We could arrange a dinner party through Akihiko and invite him and his lover." Yuri suggested then stopped and threw a quick look at Tanaka. "You don't mind do you?"

"Mind. About what?" Tanaka asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"Him having a male lover." She asked tentatively. For some reason his answer was important to her. She needed to know that he didn't look negatively on her own sons. She was surprised with herself at how quick she now genuinely looked upon Haruhiko as her son.

"No. I don't have a problem with his sexual orientation. As long as he is loved, that is all I hope for." He looked Yuri in the eyes and then continued. "Yuri, I love Haruhiko and Akihiko as if they were my own. I have no negative thoughts towards them and who they love. They have been blessed to be loved by people who would do anything for them."

"Thank you Tanaka," Yuri sighed with relief.

"Silly girl." Tanaka smirked at her.

"Watch it," she responded fondly. "Now how are we going to get Akihiko to agree to this without any awkward questions."

Ten minutes later the two returned to the lounge room. As they entered the room they heard Haruhiko talking to Akihiko and laughing about some prank he had played on Hiroki when they were children. Whilst they were talking Akihiko's phone began to ring. Looking at the caller ID he smiled and said as he answered the call, "Speaking of the Devil."

* * *

Hope you like this chapter. Wonder what's going on between the Lady Usami and the Butler. Please feed my addiction and review. To all those who have reviewed in the past thank you sooooo much. Thanks also to all those who have added me to their story alerts. Have a great year.


	13. Chapter 13

I don't own JJ Romantica or Gravitation. I only aspire to do them justice.

Chapter 13

"Hiro-san?" A soft voice rumbled near the sleeping professors ear. "Hiro-san it's time to wake up. I've prepared breakfast."

"Huh, ye..ah. I'm awake. Just give me a minute to adjust." Hiroki grumbled tiredly.

Nowaki started to rise from the bed when the professors arm reached out and wrapped around his waist preventing him from moving away.

"Hiro-san?" The puzzled Nowaki asked. It was unusual for his beloved to show such outward displays of affection.

"Is everything okay?" Hiroki asked his face buried in the pillow. However, Nowaki could still see the tips of his eyes coloured in such a delightful shade of red. Nowaki smiled and ruffled his lovers hair with his large warm hand.

"Everything is fine Hiro-san. More than fine, in fact. I feel as though a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. To celebrate I've taken the day off work."

Hiroki raised himself on one elbow and smirked at his tall lover. He raised his eyebrows in his attempt at a leer. It was so comical that Nowaki had to bite the inside of his cheek to prevent himself from laughing out loud at the sight of it.

"It's my day off also. Whatever will we do to fill in the time?" His hand slowly creeping up his lovers abdomen.

"I don't know about you but I am going to see Akihiko." Nowaki said rising from the bed and heading out to the kitchen.

"Huh?" Hiroki said stunned looking at the door to the bedroom. He jumped up out of bed and chased after Nowaki catching him as he was sitting in front of the breakfast table.

"What did you just say?" Hiroki asked with a shocked stunned look. He searched Nowakis face for any sign of stress and found only his usual calm open expression.

"Can you arrange it, Hiro-san? First thing this morning would be good. It would leave the rest of the day free for…other things." A smirk now playing on his lips. He couldn't believe the shocked look Hiroki had on his face. The smirk slowly leaving his face as he came to realize the pressure Hiroki had been under because of his own insecurities.

"It's okay Hiro-san. I just want to see for myself the feelings he has for Misaki before I decide whether it is right for me to tell him where to find him."

"Oh, so your going to tell him?" Hiroki asked hopefully. He had been scared by Akihiko's behaviour since Misaki's disappearance. Although Akihiko looked fierce on the outside he knew that was just a cover to hide a truly sensitive and vulnerable spirit.

"Only if I think it is in Misaki's best interest. At the moment Misaki needs him but if Akihiko's feelings are not as strong as Misaki's then it would be better if Misaki recovers without him."

"Oh they are strong enough. Nothing would keep Akihiko away from his lover. Nothing."

"I hope you are right. Do you want to ring him now and see if it is convenient?"

"Sure." Hiroki went into the bedroom then returned to the dining room with his mobile in his hand. He dialled Akihiko's number whilst he sat down at the table.

Some moments later he hanged up and smiled across the table. The smile faltered into a frown at the strange look on Nowaki's face.

"What is it Nowaki?"

"You didn't have to phone him in front of me. I don't feel insecure about him anymore."

"That may be so but I don't want to hide anything from you ever again. I want to be able to be more open with my feelings and thoughts."

"Thank you Hiro-san." Nowaki smiled at Hiroki before reaching across the table to ruffle his hair again. Hiroki sighed with contentment. All was right in his world, he only hoped that all would soon be right in Akihiko's.

It was perhaps an hour later when the two men arrived at the front door of the Usami Family residence. The door was answered by the family butler.

"Good morning Master Hiroki a pleasure to see you sir." The butler welcomed them in his soft well mannered voice. The butler smiled at Hiroki. He had been a welcomed friend to his Master Akihiko during childhood. The butler then turned to face Nowaki and his smile faltered. "Eh, huh, you must be Master Nowaki?"

Hiroki frowned. Something was not right. Tanaka, the butler, was well trained in his manners. He had been a butler for the Usami family for as long as he could remember. He didn't falter. Ever. He also never fumbled over a greeting. The smile on his face now seemed normal. Maybe he only imagined it. It had been a stressful few days after all. Maybe the confrontation with Nowaki was now making him oversensitive to the reactions and expressions of other people. Could it be that the butler didn't approve of his relationship with Nowaki? How did he even know of it?

He quietly followed Nowaki, and the butler, into the reception room of the family residence were he knew Akihiko would be waiting for him. He had been a bit surprised when Akihiko said to meet here. He thought that Akihiko would fight it out with his brother last night then return to his own apartment.

Tanaka stopped at the reception room door and hesitated. Then he turned to the two men accompanying him and said, "Please wait here good masters whilst I let Master Akihiko know of your arrival."

Tanaka opened the door and entered the room. The door did not completely close behind him and Hiroki curiously watched him as he walked across the room. He almost turned to Nowaki when he noticed that he did not go up to Akihiko but rather he went up Lady Usami. He was just puzzling to himself at her presence in the same room with her estranged son, and miracles of miracles they weren't being hostile to each other when he notice her face go pale at Tanaka's words. Her face was clearly shocked but her eyes .. her eyes seemed to be filled with sudden hope. It was very puzzling. She seemed to be watching the doorway eagerly.

Tanaka returned and indicated for them to enter the room.

"Master Akihiko your friend Master Hiroki-san and Master Kusami," At Nowaki's name Sebastion looked across at Lady Usami. It was as if a secret message was passing between them.

Shaking the nonsense from his head Hiroki walked up to Akihiko.

"Akihiko any news as yet. Did Hirohiko confess?" Hiroki asked his childhood friend. He noticed the look Akihiko threw his mother and how his mother's face became flushed.

"It wasn't Hirohiko."

"It wasn't? Then who was it? Surely not your father?"

"No. It doesn't matter who it was. They are truly sorry for the trouble they have caused. It was basically a big misunderstanding." Akihiko smiled sadly. Then he leaned towards his friend to whisper. "What is your lover doing here? I thought he couldn't stand me."

Hiroki leaned forward to also whisper, "He wants to talk to you about Misaki. Please be open with him. It is very important."

Nowaki strolled hesitantly up to Hiroki's side before bowing to Akihiko. "Good morning Akihiko-san. I owe you an apology. Due to my own misconception I thought bad things of you. Hiro-san has shown me my error. Please allow me to speak with you in private." Turning to Hiroki he continued. "It would perhaps be best if it was a private conversation."

"Huh? You don't want me to stay?" Hiroki asked stunned. He missed the look that passed between the butler and Lady Usami.

"Ah, Master Hiroki. Why don't you join Lady Usami in the dining room?" Tanaka interrupted, his words earning him a puzzled look from Akihiko.

"Oh, ah, I'd, ah, be delighted Lady Usami." Hiroki lied throwing a desperate look towards both his lover and his childhood friend. Both of whom pretended not to see it.

The door closed leaving Nowaki alone with the man he had always feared would take his Hiroki away from him. For the first time he truly looked at his Hiro-san's childhood friend. He had always been puzzled as to how the two had become friends let alone maintained that friendship over so many years. They were so different that he had felt that there had to have been some form of affection, more than friendship, to maintain their relationship.

Now that he was alone with him Nowaki didn't know how to start the conversation. The conversation was starting to make him feel uncomfortable. Too many years of hostility, on his side he was ashamed to admit, to be relaxed in Akihiko's presence. The wealth around him awed him and highlighted the difference between their stations. Akihiko was so far above him that he wouldn't even show up on the radar in his presence. He began to feel like he was impertinent to even presume to pass judgement on Akihiko and Misaki's relationship. Maybe he should just tell him where he was and leave.

Suddenly the door was flung open and a slightly older man, whom Nowaki immediately presumed was the hated older brother, burst into the room waving about a paperbook novel in his hands.

"Akihiko, you bastard," the man shouted in agitation. "What does Misaki think of you using him as fodder for your trashy novels?"

Nowaki was stunned by the tone of the man's voice in addressing Akihiko. Here was someone else who spoke to him in the same tone as his Hiro-san. Does Akihiko allow other people to be this familiar with him? He had thought only his Hiro-san was allowed to tell Akihiko off. He had thought that because his Hiro-san was allowed this level of familiarity with Akihiko it meant a certain level of intimacy and affection existed between the two.

What truly shocked Nowaki was the hint of a blush on Akihiko's face as Akihiko glanced at him and the glimpse of fear he saw in his eyes during that glance.

"Hirohiko, put that away. Can't you see we have a guest?" Akihiko pleaded with his brother reaching out for the book.

Hirohiko looked behind him as if noticing Nowaki for the first time.

"If you're two ashamed that you write this trash then you shouldn't put your lover in it." Hirohiko stated in a huff.

"I am not ashamed of my writing. It's very well written you know. I happen to know that you have every one of those books." Akihiko defended his work and finished on a smirk aimed at his brother.

"Fine then I'll just give it to your guest to read. I am sure he would find it really fascinatiting." Hirohiko shouted as his face went red with embarrassment. He turned and stomped towards the door tossing Nowaki the book as he walked through the door and slamming it behind him.

Nowaki caught the book stunned. He stared after Hirohiko for a few minutes before finally glancing down at the book in his hand.

"Terrific." Akihiko muttered in disgust before flopping down onto the lounge and dropping his head into his hands in despair.

"Um, interesting book." Nowaki commented, more for something to say than for any other reason. "I've actually read a few of these." He added before blushing. He didn't know why his mouth felt the need to admit that little bit of information.

"Do you like them?" Akihiko asked with a strange look in his eye.

"Don't tell Hiro-san but I actually find them really enjoyable. Hiro-san would probably look down on me if I told them I read them," Nowaki stated a bit guiltily.

"I won't tell Hiroki that you read them if you won't tell him that I wrote them," Akihiko smirked relaxing for the first time since he and Nowaki had been left alone in the room.

"WHAT!!" Nowaki exclaimed shocked. Maybe he heard wrong. Yes that was it. There was no way that the winner of the Naomori and Kikukawa Awards would write the sensual boys love novels that he enjoyed so much. Finally the conversation he had just witnessed between Akihiko and his brother made sense. He opened the book and read a random page and there, sure enough, was a love scene between two men, one of whom was named Misaki.

Akihiko sat quietly for a moment before looking at Nowaki and speaking softly. "How many of my books have you read?"

"All of them I think. Your one of my favourite authors of this genre." Nowaki answered puzzled. Was Akihiko looking for some form of hero worship or awe? Was he really that conceited?

"So you would say you know the characters in them quite well."

"Ye.e.e.s" Nowaki said slowly trying to see where Akihiko was coming from.

"What do you think of the relationship between the main character and his brother?"

"Well there is a lot of love there. They are really close. Each of them are supportive of each other. There is almost a co-dependent relationship between the main character and the brother. The main character seems always to be looking for approval from the brother and treats him as if he was the most important person in his life, secondary to the main character's lover."

"Tell me, does the brother remind you of anyone.?" Akihiko asked staring at Nowaki intently.

"Well…"

"The brother is always a proud man who is very intelligent. Someone who hides his concern and kindness behind a curtain of verbal abuse and false anger. Someone who…"

"Hiro-san," Nowaki gasped in surprise. "Why didn't I see it before? The brother in all your stories is Hiro-san."

"My stories are my fantasies. What I really wish for in real life. Hiroki has always been the brother I hoped Haruhiko could have been. Haru has always been the distant cousin if he even rates a mention. The passion that the main character feels for his lover is the same passion I feel for Misaki. Some of the more kinkier stuff, however, is my editors ideas. Damn fangirls."

Nowaki smiled before he said, "You've never been in love with Hiroki have you?"

Akihiko choked on the coffee that he had just taken a sip of, and then stared at the tall young man in front of him.

"Are you insane?" Akihiko asked him. The thought of him and Hiroki, in an intimate position, sent shivers down his spine – and not the pleasurable kind. Oh, alright there had been that one time in Uni but that had been sooo much of a mistake that he and Hiroki never spoke of it.

"Why are you so concerned about Hiro-san finding out that you writing these books?" Nowaki asked puzzled. He was relieved by Akihiko's response to his question. Although he trusted Hiroki when he said he didn't have those kind of feelings for Akihiko there was always the change that Akihiko.

Akihiko didn't know what to say. After years of manipulation by his mother he had learnt to keep his feelings well and truly hidden away. Even now it was only Misaki who he truly bared his heart to. Hiroki had asked him to be open. It would be hard but he trusted his friend and if it would lead him to Misaki he was willing to do anything.

"Hiroki saved me. It sounds overly dramatic but it's true. I was raised in an emotionally cold household and I couldn't cope with it. I would hide away and escape into my writing. I couldn't breathe outside of it. When I met Hiroki his friendship was like a beacon of light in the darkness leading me to warmth. His family became my adopted family, if only emotionally. His friendship anchored me in this world. I don't really know when his friendship became love but for a short time it did." Akihiko paused and looked Nowaki in the eyes.

Nowaki saw pain in those eyes. Pain and fear.

"I was so afraid when I couldn't return those feelings that I would lose his friendship and would once more be cast adrift into a cold world. You, however, came along and showed him what true love was. I'm ashamed to admit that for a time I was jealous of that. I was still in love with someone who didn't return those feelings. About these books I'm sure you know how passionate Hiroki is regarding literature. I'm afraid that if he knows I write these books he will think less of me. It's not that I love him, not like you, but I do need him. He keeps me anchored. I can be a bit …"

"Flaky?" Nowaki asked with a teasing smile. It felt weird to be teasing Akihiko but good as well. Like teasing an older brother.

"Oy." Akihiko responded in mock offence. "Watch it."

"What about Misaki?"

"With Misaki I can be myself. In fact Misaki can see through whatever façade I put up and see the real me. He not only see's my flaws but he overlooks them, as if they are not important, he loves me in spite of them. It's as if, with him, I am finally free to be the real me. Wart's and all. He accepts me on a level that I had never dreamed was possible."

Nowaki leaned back in his chair and watched in awe at the change in Akihiko. He had always thought of him as a cold arrogant man. However, the warm look of adoration he held in his eyes as he spoke of his lover moved him. His lover was right. Akihiko clearly loved his Misaki. Nowaki took a deep breath. The decision in the end had been easy to make.

"A few days ago a friend of mine asked me for a favour. It seems a friend of his lover had been assaulted but refused to go to the hospital. Whilst talking to Hiro-san I discovered that he was Misaki."

"Misaki's hurt. Is he alright?," Akihiko gasped, his face palling to a deathly grey colour.

Nowaki was awed at the level of fear and terror that shone out of Akihiko's eyes at the thought of his lover being hurt. Quickly he rushed to reassure him.

"He's safe. He only sustained bruises and has had a bad shock."

"Who were they?" Akihiko's eyes threatened impending death. The fear and terror that had shone from them early had now been burnt away by the pure unadulterated fury Akihiko was clearly feeling towards the people who had dared to lay a hand on his lover.

"The police have them in custody. Apparently they had been harassing people in the nearby park for the last few days. There had been many complaints. Misaki won't be required to face them in court."

"And your sure that Misaki is okay."

"Physically he'll recover within a few weeks. Emotionally he's going to need more time. He needs you. He talks about you in his sleep but when he wakes up he refuses to have you contacted. Hiro-san has told me of the misunderstanding he is under. I will tell you where he is."

"Aren't you a doctor? Isn't that against the confidentiality clause you work under."

"I've been thinking about that. If he came to the hospital then I couldn't tell you anything, however, as it was a favour as a friend and not as a doctor that I treated him then I don't have a problem with it."

Akhiko looked eagerly at Nowaki. He opened his mouth to speak but suddenly stopped. He stood up and looked out the window onto the vast grounds beyond them.

"Usami-san." Nowaki asked clearly puzzled by Akihiko's behaviour.

"Call me Akihiko." Akihiko said finally facing the lover of his best friend.

"Akihiko." Nowaki smiled before continuing. "Do you understand what I just said?"

"Yes. I understand. However…"

* * *

I am sooo sorry it has taken so long. I lost the flash drive I had it stored on. Then I kept doubting it. Those of you who send me reviews I need them badly on this one. Is it ok??? I am desperate for a review fix right now. Please inspire me. Be my muse. Am I begging enough do you think? Please, please, please review. Do you get the idea. Thanking you in advance.


	14. Chapter 14

Don't own either JJ Romantica or Gravitation, only wish I could write as good.

Chapter 14

Shuichi quietly let himself into Hito's apartment. He had come earlier than usual today because he hoped, after Nowaki's visit, that he could finally get Misaki to come out of the apartment for a picnic at the park. After what had happened to Misaki he felt that he needed to create some good memories in the park or else those thugs would have won.

He took a moment to smile softly to himself before entering the apartment. It felt strange to rock up unannounced at Hito's apartment without having had a fight with Yuki first. Strange but good.

He dropped the grocery bags on the kitchen table before popping his head into the bedroom to check on Misaki.

He was surprised to see Misaki awake and staring out the bedroom window. The early morning sunlight shone through the window and lit up Misaki's face. When Misaki didn't respond to his greeting he walked up to the window and looked out to see what had caught his friend's undivided attention.

The window looked out onto the park where Misaki had been attacked. Shuichi sucked in his breath in concern and looked again at Misaki's face. However, the look on Misaki's face was not one of fear or anxiety but of a deep longing. Shuichi looked again out the window and noticed, for the first time, that the apartment where Misaki lived with his 'landlord' could clearly be seen.

Shuichi quietly left the room to make breakfast. 'It's time to do something,' he thought to himself. It was clear that Misaki was deeply missing his lover. 'It's definitely a misunderstanding but how can I help him if he refuses to talk to me about what happened.'

He finished making breakfast and sat it on the bedside table. Misaki hadn't moved from the window. He didn't even acknowledge Shuichi's presence at all. It was as if he was in a world all of his own.

Shuichi heard his cell phone ringing and returned to the kitchen. When he looked at his caller id he was surprised to see Misaki's number there.

"Eh, er Hello? Who's this?"

"Who's this?" A belligerent young voice came over the phone.

"I asked first,"Shuichi asked whilst trying to keep from smiling.

"Oh, right." The young voice responded hesitantly. "My name is Shinobu I'm a friend of Misaki. He's gone missing and I've found his broken phone in the park and…and…your number was the last number he dialled."

There was a slight pause before the voice continued. "Do you know where Misaki is? We want him back? Please…please tell me you know something."

Shuichi could clearly hear the fear and pain in the young man's voice. He was telling the truth. This young man clearly held affection towards Misaki. He looked towards the bedroom thinking of the young man sitting in the bed staring out the window. Misaki certainly had a way with him. He seemed to draw people to him.

"Eh, hello. Are you there? Oi?" The voice on the other end of the phone was becoming increasingly agitated.

"Eh, sorry." Shuichi apologised. He took a moment to make a decision then continued, "Let's meet."

"Where," the young voice responded immediately.

Shuichi smiled to himself. He could come to like this guy. "How about where you found Misaki's phone?"

"Okay, when?" the voice agreed immediately.

"In an hour?" Shuichi suggested.

"Ok, see you there." There was a slight pause. "How will we know each other?"

"I've got bright pink hair."

"You're not serious, "the voice stated shocked.

"Yep," Shuichi confirmed with a smug smile. He was really proud of his hair.

"This I have got to see." The voice laughed, "See you in an hour." Then there was silence.

Shuichi sat motionless as he thought about the phone call. Misaki loved his Usagi-san. Misaki was his friend. As his friend he had every right to meddle to ensure his friend's happiness. His conscience was clear. He was smiling to himself as he rang Yuki. Shuichi grinned broadly when he heard Yuki's voice answering the phone.

"Yuki, Yuki, Yuki," Shuichi sang out happily.

"What is it brat? I'm busy. Got a deadline you know." Yuki asked grumpily.

Shuichi smiled at the bluster from his lover. "I need you."

He knew that with just those words his Yuki would drop what he was doing to help him out. Of course it helped that he also knew that Yuki's latest literary offering was almost completed two weeks ahead of schedule.

"What's wrong?" The concern in his lover's voice sent shivers down Shuichi's spine.

"I need to meet someone and I need you to sit with Misaki. He's acting a bit strangely."

"Who are you meeting?" Yuki asked possessively. Shuichi felt a shiver of desire run through his entire body. Mind you that soon dissipated and had Shuichi pouting with Yuki's next words,

"What's wrong with Misaki?"

"He's sitting up in bed staring out the window. He's so far into this world of his own that he doesn't even know that I'm here. "

"What do you think he's staring at?"

"His apartment or more importantly where his lover lives."

"And the person your meeting?"

"A friend of Misaki. I'm working on a plan to get him back home with his love where he belongs." After a short pause Shuichi added slyly. "Then there will be no stopping us."

"Go. I'll be there in 5 minutes." Yuki demanded then the phone went dead. Shuichi could just imagine his Yuki charging from the apartment to get to Hito's as soon as possible.

Having Misaki hadn't been a bother, however, the stress of the assault and the distraction of caring for Misaki had put a slight temporary strain on their "together time".

Misaki didn't know when he first woke up or what woke him. Just that it was a feeling that he had done something terribly wrong.

The view outside the bedroom window was pitch black with only the streetlights flickering like stars against the night sky. As he looked he noticed that one light seemed to be brighter

than all the others. The sky began to lighten as dawn drew closer and slowly he began to make out the outlines of the buildings.

His breath caught as he realized that the bright light had come from the apartment where Usagi-san lived. It was as if Usagi-san had lit a beacon to light Misaki's way home.

As that thought took root another thought joined it. He had been an idiot. Worse than that he had acted like a child and been that which he had always tried not to be. A bother. He

thought back at the conversation he had had with his brother when he had finally told him his relationship with Usagi-san. He had tried so hard to convince his brother that he was an

adult and yet here he was at the first real hurdle in their relationship and he'd run away like a child.

Not only that he was only just now realizing that something about the whole letter affair was bothering him. That is what had woken him. There was something wrong about that letter

but for the life of him he couldn't put his finger on it. What annoyed him the most though, was the suspicion that when he realized what was wrong it was going to be obvious. So obvious

that he was going to hate himself for not realizing it sooner.

Misaki barely registered Shuichi's entrance to the apartment. So focused on his problem that he didn't notice his breakfast being set down or even the sound of Shuichi's phone going off.

In the distance he heard Shuichi saying goodbye and something about Nowaki or was it Yuki coming soon but Misaki didn't respond. He felt he was closing in on his problem but with every

sound it drifted away again.

He almost had it when the sound of Yuki entering the bedroom scared it away again.

Misaki had had enough. He had spent hours trying to figure it out but everyone seemed to be determined not to let him have a minute's peace to solve the puzzle.

"Will you just shut up?" He yelled out in frustration. The minute the words left his mouth he was shocked. He didn't yell like that, except at Usagi-san. It wasn't in his nature to be so rude

to others. What the hell was he doing?

He looked in horror at the shocked face of Yuki then burst into tears.

Yuki let himself into Hito's apartment. He had met Shuichi at the bottom of the stairs to the apartment. Now he was as confused as ever. A normal state of mind since hooking up with that

brat. Speaking to Shuichi was sometimes like speaking a whole different language.

He did understand however, that Shuichi was concerned with Misaki's behaviour. Apparently he had ignored Shuichi when he had arrived. Yuki thought that was impossible himself. He

had tried many times to ignore Shuichi himself and had never been able to do it. The thought that someone could would have to rate up there with the realization of world peace. Not in

his lifetime.

He entered the bedroom and stood silently watching Misaki. Shuichi had been right. Misaki was acting strangely. Just as he opened his mouth in greeting Misaki turned to him.

"Will you just shut up?" Misaki yelled.

Yuki was stunned. Not many people had the nerve to yell at him let alone tell him to shut up. He stared at Misaki and watched the shock and horror cross the young man's face. Then he

burst into tears.

"God, why does this always happen to me?" He moaned in disgust before sitting on the bed and pulling the unresisting sobbing young man into his arms. Trying to give comfort to the teenager was a strange and unnerving experience for Yuki.

As the sobs began to get weaker Yuki gently rubbed Misaki's back. It was something that he knew Shuichi liked when he got upset.

"Misaki, what is wrong? Can you tell me?" He asked in a soft voice. Although he had only known Misaki for a short time he had come to like the quiet teenager.

"I'm sorry Yuki. I..I don't know what came over me. I..I didn't mean to yell at you. I am such a horrible person." Misaki sobbed.

"Misaki do not worry about it. Something is bothering you. Shuichi knew it and I could see it as soon as I entered the bedroom. What is it? Maybe I can help. What were you thinking about this morning?"

"Something woke me this morning."

"What was it? A noise?"

"No. It was like a sense that something was wrong. That I was wrong. But I don't know what I've done wrong."

"You haven't done anything wrong, Misaki."

"That's just it. I feel that I have and it's got something to do with that letter."

"Letter? What letter?"

Misaki said nothing but looked again out the window. Just when Yuki began to think that Misaki wasn't going to say anymore he began to speak again.

"Yuki?" Misaki asked in a soft hesitant voice. "If Shuichi had got a letter from a past lover wanting to get back together with him would you just walk away?"

"Hell no. Never." Yuki stated firmly. Absolute refusal to accept that possibility written on his face. His eyes became hard as steel and as cold as ice.

"Not even for Shuichi's happiness."

"Not even for that. I would fight for him. If you ever tell him I said this I'll strangle you. If I didn't have Shuichi that would be the point. Everything would be various shades of grey. He brings colour into my life. Besides I trust in Shuichi's love. He shows it to me in hundreds of little ways every day. Don't you believe in Usagi-san's love for you?"

Misaki hung his head. He was beginning to think that he was the biggest idiot on the planet.

"Misaki?" Yuki asked gently. "Does this have something to do with that letter you were talking about earlier?"

"The letter was addressed to Usagi-san from his..tutor..lover…whoever." Misaki muttered miserably.

"I didn't think you would be the type to read someone else's mail." Yuki was a bit shocked at this behaviour. Shuichi wouldn't dare read his mail.

"I don't read Usagi-san's mail." Misaki stated affronted that Yuki would even think that of him.

"But you just said you read a letter addressed to Usagi-san," Yuki was starting to get confused.

"It was addressed to me."

"You just said it was addressed to Usagi-san."

"The letter was addressed to Usagi-san but the envelope was addressed to me."

"Why would it be addressed to you?"

Misaki stopped. This was it. This was what was bothering him. Why was the letter in an envelope addressed to him? Could the author of the letter merely have made a mistake? But why would the author have written to him in the first place?

"What is it Misaki?" Yuki asked concerned at the silence coming from the teenager.

"Your right. Why would the envelope have been addressed to me?" puzzled Misaki. It just didn't make sense.

"What was so important about this letter?"

"It was from Usagi-san's tutor who was returning after five years to reunite with Usagi-san." Misaki said softly. He was beginning to have doubts about that letter.

"Misaki, tell me about Usagi-san. What is he like?"

"He's arrogant, bossy, abrupt, rude, a sexual harasser…." Misaki muttered with pretend anger. His cheeks flushing a bright pink.

"Eh, that bad huh. Looks like you've had a lucky escape." Yuki said with a smile he was careful to keep hidden from Misaki.

Misaki was quite for a few minutes before he sighed softly. "No. He isn't like that."

"Then what is he really like?"

"He's kind, loving and very loyal. He had an unrequited love for my brother for ten years. In that time he did nothing that would offend my brother. Preferring to stay by his side as a friend rather than be ostracised by him."

"But I thought he was in love with this tutor who wrote the letter. Or did he love both of them."

"That's it." Misaki exclaimed excitedly. "That's what has been bugging me. That letter was clearly a fake and was sent to me to cause trouble."

Yuki smiled at the excited and relieved look on Misaki's face. He could see the joy blazing from his beautiful emerald eyes. Slowly the excitement left Misaki's body. The joy turning to fear and despair.

"What is it Misaki?" Yuki asked concerned.

"Why didn't I see it sooner? How is he ever going to forgive me?" With that Misaki again broke into tears. Not the gentle kind but great wracking sobs that tore at his chest and his throat.. Yuki again pulled him into his arms and tightly held him. Slowly the sobbing slowed and stopped. Soon Yuki realised that Misaki had fallen into a deep sleep.

"God I need a cigarette," Yuki muttered before he leaned against the bedroom wall and closed his eyes. Soon he too fell asleep with Misaki leaning against his chest and resting gently in his arms.

Sorry I haven't written so long but life sucked for a while. Now its not so bad again. :) My only problem now is if I've lost the plot.


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